I REALLY laughed out loud on that line ... you made my day! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I have done this in the past. Now I do my best to avoid pointing things out. In the past it would stop me from doing something or completing something. I make more things than anyone in my family (my sister might crochet more than I do but not by much) and give almost all of it away. Everyone is delighted that I thought of them. So I now am operating on the "Just Do It" theory, if you want to do just go ahead and do it. If you enjoy doing it who cares what others think? Those who nitpick everything apart say things because they not able to do what you did anyway!

So now I say Too Bad! So Sad. And I go on and do my own thing.

Ahhh the ancient Theory of Nike,"Just do It" we should all live by it!

I agree that we can be way too hard on ourselves about our own work. But don't you think we do it for just about everything - not just our quilting?? Whether it's compliments on a quilt, an outfit, our new couch, the list goes on - we tend to downplay good comments & often (even as said before), disagree with the admirer! Yet if no one said a kind word, we'd be ticked! It's hard to be gracious & humble, but I've found the simplest way to respond is to just smile & say 'Thank you. I really enjoyed making this one'. And be done.

Ladies, and gents, That's because they're all so beautiful we just can't believe we made it.

I think sometimes we're so worried that other people will pick up on our mistakes and not mention them, just thinking to themselves that we are clueless and a bad quilter, or something, so we feel like if we point the mistakes out preemptively, they won't think that of us or something.

Recently I had a "humility block" of my own. Didn't notice it until I was done, binding on, label on, everything. I had to practically bite my tongue to keep from pointing it out to the recipient and everyone else. Maybe she noticed, maybe she didn't. No one has mentioned it.

I had to laugh when I read some of the post...my mom is awful... she can find a flaw in a near perfect piece. I have quit showing her any of my work.. she is my worst critic and has hurt my feelings many times. I am very critical of my work,I have learned to love my flaws and not include my mom.

I, too, will try to do this. I say try, because it will be a whole new way of life for me! LOL...

My husband always tells me that if I didn't point out my mistakes (in all things, not just quilting) nobody would notice.

I am definitely taking the oath.

It is amazing isn't it, how hard we are on ourselves. I mean, your "self talk" would never be aimed at or uttered to another person, would it?

True, we learn by our mistakes and always strive to improve, but being negative is just paralyzing...and you can't quilt if you are rigid with fear of failure.

Great thread Ken, food for thought indeed!

Wanna see the picture of the one she wasn't sure of? I love my table runner which is now on my dresser in my bedroom.

Yes, I'm the same way. I had two turning points in the last month. 1) i went to a quilt show with my SIL and she pointed out that I do MUCH better work than the majority of the quilters there. and 2) I found a glaring boo-boo on a quilt in a pattern book. Yip -- we ALL make mistakes. Or as I mother says "Only God made something perfect"...

Wanna see the picture of the one she wasn't sure of? I love my table runner which is now on my dresser in my bedroom.[/quote]

Beautiful table runner!!!

As a longarm quilter, I get to see my mistakes when I make them and again when I quilt the quilt! I've seen some very interesting piecing (mine included!), but after it's quilted, all I can see is the beautiful quilt. I have such an up-close-and-personal experience with the quilt, every "oops" is noticeable, but when you stand back and look, the "oops" magically disappear, and all I see is the love in every stitch. No one likes to have all that love looked at critically. So tell me, why do we enter our quilts in shows to be judged??? :lol:

Am always so critical of my work. Accept compliments.

My mum is probably not as bad as yours, but I also fell over laughing at some of the earlier posts! She'd be the first to ask did I have to use that colour, should this not be more pointed, and it would have been nicer had I done xyz. I will never be an advanced / master quilter so I expect to always have flaws and just decide if they're ones I can live with or ones that need to be fixed. I suppose I prefer to point them out so I don't feel like people are discussing them behind my back!

:P Like button is pushed! :-D

:lol: :lol: :lol: Now this made me laugh!

(1) Getting an honest criticism from a teacher who is trying to help you learn something is entirely different from someone who pcks your work apart. We welcome that kind of criticism because it helps us to become better quilters.

(2) I laughed out loud when I read this.

That is something I read that could help you.
"Perfection is not a goal in making quilts. People should enjoy the process and pay attention to get better everyday. God has chosen not to make exact duplicates in nature and it is not our job as quilters to make exact duplicates either.

I leave in my mistakes (ahem) so that others will feel better about the mistakes they make. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!! Smiles and hugs!!

I think we all have a friend like that,. I have one that takes things out of my hands and does it her way. Last time, I took it back from her and changed it right back to my way. She hasn't done it again since.

I did not receive complements when I was young, so it is very hard for me to except them as an adult. I get upset with myself because I think it could be better. I am still teaching myself to quilt and I want so much to be able to make the beautiful quilts you all make. and I hope someday to do it. I know when I post a picture, I wait to see what you all say, because it means a great deal to me. and It does give me incuragment to keep posting what I make. God bless. Penny

When I first started quilting the woman who taught me told me that I would never make an absolutely perfect quilt. She said all quilts have at least one small flaw - and that's what gives them character. Well...I'm a bit of a perfectionist and set out to prove her wrong. I stopped trying years ago LOL! I've learned to live with the fact that my quilts will have at least one character flaw and some of them are just FULL of character!

If I am not mistaken, our creator did not intend for us to be perfect. We all have that flaw that makes us want to be perfect. I too am a perfectionist, but also a realist. I know that there will always be something that I am not perfectly pleased with. Perfection is in our own mind (or imagination). People who don't or can't do what we do think it is perfect. I certainly wouldn't criticize a beautiful cabinet maker; and I am sure he can see flaws in his work too.

Well, technically that isn't correct. Adam & Eve took it upon themselves to ruin perfection by eating the forbidden fruit. ;) Although I guess, depending on your religion, it may be a bit different than that.


I've been quilting for 18 and a half years now (can't forget the half! :lol: ) and someday I will make a perfect quilt. But right now it's all about the journey. :-D

Perhaps the "friend" who needs to find flaws needs to feel superior. I'd stop showing her my work and if she asked I'd saw "Sorry my work isnot up to show quality yet" We quilt for our enjoyment and those of family and friends who appreciate the memories we make.

Nothing I do is ever 100% perfect. I really don't think anyone's is. However, I love everything I do. Quite the contrast to most of you. Surely somewhere in there you have to like it or you wouldn't show pictures of it and show it off to the rest of us unless you "truely want it criticized". Be proud of everything you do. Quilting, like life has a learning curve. We are always getting better at it. God built us the way we are so we can't kick ourselves in our own butt. Live and learn, learn and live, and be happy with the choices you make. Otherwise you will constantly be wollowing in dispair. There's no fun in that and you loose the lessons you can learn. Keep an open mind and be happy. This is the phylosophy I live by. I hope I inspire you to live by it too.

Oh, and by the way, I take the oath too, LOL!

I am a perfectionist and am my own worst critic. I know this and I am working on it...even have a post about this on my blog. I too will take the oath!

As someone trained to measure, calibrate, remeasure and check things others have made (usually to 4 decimal places but microns aren't unusual either), it is an ingrained habit to check my work. I compete with myself to guage improvement. I like my seams to match and my points to actually be there. I'm far more left brained than right. I use loved ones (and others) to point out errors with pattern and color because I'm trying to learn about these things. If I can't analyze what makes something really awesome or why something isn't working for me, what is the point of doing it? If I just accept status quo I would never improve.

I have always been creative, stained glass, goldsmithing, painting, etc. I had this picture in my mind of what I wanted to do. When it didn't end up looking like that picture, I thought I had failed. It took me many years to see that I had actually improved on the original. Now I can't follow a pattern because I look and see where it can be improved. I am a much happier camper now but it has taken many years to get here.

Hugggggs and 3 cheers for so many of us who are deciding to be easier on ourselves.
Labfairy, I don't think that means not trying to improve, it just means not being so hard on ourselves when we are not perfect. As long as we keep trying to do our best, we are bound to improve and not stay at the status quo.
quilterguy, I agree, I know I am proud of the things I have made so far. They are not perfect but they are mine and I love them. I'm sure they will get better as I gain experience, and I will love those too.
But most important of all, I love planning, cutting, piecing and all the rest of the process. It gives me pleasure and therapy and joy. And best of all, it gave me this board and all you wonderful folks!!!

I can be critical of my work but it's funny that through out the whole process as I'm grouching at myself and tell myself that I don't like the way something is turning out, when it comes to giving it away suddenly it's the most beautiful thing I've ever made!

I think this is one of those semantics things (I can be very literal). I am not understanding the definition of being critical of my own work. I view quilting from a constructive process. I'm just not right brained enough to be any other way. I am very happy with things I make in the end but I may rip them out a few times in the process. I began this quilting process to strengthen my visual/spacial skills. Give me a set of numbers, I'm good. Give me shapes and color and I struggle. I'm getting better but I laugh at my mistakes daily. What is obvious to everyone else isn't so obvious to me. I put together a "frog" block using squares and triangles but somehow the feet were wrong. I didn't have a clue until my husband asked why it there wasn't any feet. :oops:

I don't understand why anyone would be ashamed to be critical of their own work. Everything I produce is a product of critical analysis. A failure analysis is conducted when something goes wrong. You should see some of my better failures. A good failure is when you learn something from it. A bad one is when you don't. I learn far more from failures than successes. It never makes me feel less about myself. I am always sure that whatever I finish is the best I could produce at any given moment with the skills I have.

Actually, mistakes are learning experiences...sometimes we have to experience it several times before we get the lesson down pat! My technique improves with every quilt I make, as does my ability to chose the colors I use in them. Perfection will never come, but I'll keep striving for it, one baby step at a time. I love something about every quilt I make and a few I love everything about them!!! Haven't made something yet that I truly hated.

I have a lot of learning experiences. I am getting really getting good with a seam ripper but can't get the color thing down. Now if I can just figure out color...

I enjoy compliments and I believe I accept them without any problem. I do however say when I post the picture an honest opinion of what I did. Most of the time I'm happy, this last time with my miniature I wasn't, but ran out of time to fix it. Normally I would correct anything I don't like about a piece.