I love to make quilts. I don't come from a family of quilters or sewers. Not even crafters. I wanted to make both my mom & sis (my only relatives living besides my 2 sons) a quilt for Christmas. When talking to them I just got a sweet but firm..NO THANKS!
It is so discouraging! I was wondering if anyone on the board has this?

Yup, there are people in my family also who are not craft lovers. Just have to make for those who love what we do.:)

Everyone is different. It doesn't make them bad people! It sounds like you have a great relationship with them. They feel comfortable to tell you what they are really thinking, which is a good thing. There are a zillion posts on this board where someone has spent a great deal of time and money on a gift quilt to have it go unappreciated and unused (on the high side) or used to line the bottom of the dog cage (low side). Don't be discouraged. Just continue to show them your completed masterpieces. One day they might surprise you and tell you they'd lilke THAT one!

Oh yes, they aren't bad people. Everytime I see them I show my projects and I get a weak "that's nice". Luckily, I do have wonderful friends & co-workers who enjoy them.

Yes, this is a common thing. My DD doesn't seem to understand my fascination with quilting. All the more reason to do charity quilting. There are many strangers who will appreciate your work and love of quilting. Don't let it discourage you. I bet if they (your family) wrapped up in a flannel quilt they would change their mind in a big hurry.

I just quilt for those who appreciate it. *shrug* I've posted on knitting communities for several years, and like clockwork someone will post a thread about "what should I knit for someone who doesn't want knitted things." The answer is always a resounding "nothing!" I think the same is true of all handcrafts. Why would you want to give a gift of a quilt to someone who doesn't want a quilt? Gifts are for the recipient, NOT the giver. I think it's kind of selfish to insist on making a quilt for someone because you want to make a quilt, rather than considering that they want a book/set of dishes/gift card. (I'm using the universal "you", not "you CAJAMK" ;)) Just stick with quilting for yourself and the people who can appreciate your effort, and everyone will be happy. :)

My son and dil say nicely "We like plain". Well, I don't do plain, I think 100 or more fabrics in a quilt is absolutely necesary. I LOVE scrappy. Luckily, my granddaughters love my quilts, and my daughter, and my friends, and my nieces. So, there is enough appreciation around.
Judi

I watched one of my relatives open a quilt gift at Christmas, and say "Oh. It's a blanket....". I explained the difference between a blanket and a quilt, but it fell on deaf ears. Other people there said "Oh, I LOVE it!", and that's who I make quilts for these days.

So far people have been gracious and appreciate the thought. I think you want to give people things that make them happy and/or show your appreciation for them. If you ask them what that would be, then you have to listen to them. At least yours told the truth.

Please don't take it personally - a lot of people hate hand-made stuff, no matter that it is. If they can tell it's handmade they don't want it. Not their style. Too hippy-dippy or crunchy-granola or whatever. Good for them ...whether their enjoyment comes from presents from Tiffany's or Walmart's!

That said, HMPH! to them. Please post your quilts so WE can enjoy looking at them! :-) :-) :-)

Yes, I think we all know people who do not like our craft. I spent a year looking for some thing my best friend would like, and embroiderd 18 blocks in her favorite colors and it looked beautiful, and I gave it to her & hubby for a special anni. There were no other people around, I didn`t want praise, just wanted them to know how special they were. I was so let down, but I learned something too. In my family, some kids keep asking for quilts and some do not want any old home thing. Who knew?

You can't please them all. You quilt to satisfy a need in yourself to make pretty things that are also useful. After such a comment I wouldn't even show them what I made.
Might be they are jealous of your talents. There are others out there who do appreciate what you do.
Keep up the good work, you will find your "quilting sisters" among your friends. We care and would love to have you in our family.

Carol J.

The only person in my family who doesn't like quilts is my son's girlfriend, but since they aren't married I won't stress about it. I make them for him and he loves them. Her taste is different but she's a great girl, not liking quilts has nothing to do with me! :D

I have the opposite. Made a quilt for 1 and requests for more are coming from everywhere.

I'm lucky. My family--4 children and 5 grandchildren--think I'm the greatest creater of quilts ever. I really appreciate their comments. They also know how much I enjoy creating. Also my DH doesn't complain too much when I bring more fabric home, only a little. He doesn't understand why I need a stash.
Sue

Two of my sisters have been beggin for a quilt so they're getting one for Christmas this year. My youngest sister said no thanks, we have enough blankets!

lol...I come from non-sewing, non-crafting family as well. They appreciate what I do; however, one sister wanted quilts for all her in-laws and when I told her what the fabric would cost. She said oh no, just make them like you made ours. Not a clue there!! Like I would use inferior materials for something for my family.

Ditto, I cant keep up. But we have a long line of DIY'ers. We all enjoy some type of "homemade" hobby.

Well at least you did not make give them a quilt that ended up as a dog bed. Yep .. made one that took months and about a month after I gave it to them it was all folded up in the dog bed. I got the message .. no more quilts for them. The only comment from them was "oh ..he just loves it". I was ...speechless. It was a queen size bargello none of the peices was larger than 1 3/4 inch.
Don't get me wrong I really love dogs .. but mine does not sleep on my quilts.

I would make the stuffed topsy turvey bunny dolls for my nieces that took forever using very expensive fabric from Japan (stationed there at the time) and send back to the states. Years later I was at an auction and was so upset to find that one of them had made it to this auction all ruined. I knew it was mine for not only the fabric, the label on the back of the bunny, but I would hand paint a little heart on it. Needless to say, no more hand anything for them.

I have a small family and most of them don't really care for them. They all got one anyway. : )

My quilts go to charitable organizations now.

quite often when you mention quilts to a non-crafter- someone who knows nothing about them they have no idea what a quilt can be--they may envision something less than appealing- very utilitarian-
i bet if you made a beautiful quilt and presented it-they would change their minds-
one of my brothers really had a (weird concept of quilts)
had no interest-
a few years ago at christmas he opened a big box from me---and was BLOWN AWAY! he loved it- took it everywhere with him- even to hospice for his last days.

I think a lot of people, when they think quilts, think of Little House on the Prairie and things like that. A big mish-mash of color in a very country style. That isn't their style so they say "nooooo thanks!"

Either that or the quilts that YOU like to make (the colors you love, the blocks and patterns you love, etc) aren't what they would choose so they think that if you made something for them they wouldn't like it because again, it's not their style.

I have to admit I generally prefer a very sleek and elegant style. I'm not big on cute, I'm not big on patchwork, and I'm not big on bright bold colors most of the time. I like things to be subtle and textured and softly elegant, and that's how I quilt. If I wasn't 100% sure that someone realized that and KNEW what I would love, I would also say no thank you! Not because I don't appreciate what work and love goes into a quilt, but because I actually DO, and I wouldn't want them to make something for me that might not be loved the way it ought to be, if that makes sense!

In short- it takes all kinds! :mrgreen:

I was at a Billie Lauder lecture years ago and she mentioned that she makes "starter" quilts. Maybe a simple rail fence? Then she sees their reaction and how they treat the quilt and if she sees positive behavior, etc. She will then make them a nicer quilt. If not, they can live with the rail fence!

this is very common, you'll see posts here of people complaining that their quilt didn't get the response they wanted.

they used it for their pet, i've never seen them use the quilt, etc.

the biggest mistake these people make is thinking everyone wants and likes their quilts and thats just not true.

you should give a gift that they would want to have not what you think they should have.

you should feel grateful that they told you the truth and you don't have to waste your time and money on a gift they will not enjoy.

Yep, gave a bargello quilt to sis, found out she regifted it. Would have much preferred she would have had the juevos to just say, thanks, but no thanks. Other than that though, I've been fortunate to make quilts for receipients that want quilts and if it's family, I now ask first.

But hopefully she regifted it to someone who truly will appreciate it! Let's face it, unless you have a totally open, blunt relationship, people are unlikely to react with a "thanks, but no thanks" when you give them an intricate quilt. Even if they have no idea how much work goes into it, they still know that you spent some time on it, and it's not as though it can be exchanged. So they express polite interest/gratitude/whatever Mom drilled into them, and they try to spare your feelings.

Unfortunately, that later leads to still hurt feelings if it's never used, used by the dog, regifted, etc....I think your new policy of asking family before making a quilt is a good one!

Is it just quilts? Wondering if they like country decor and if so maybe quilted runner, apron, mug rugs, wall hangings, or table toppers? Just a thought :D

My family is small. My mother liked the memory quilt that I made for my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary but she wouldn’t enjoy a bed or lap quilt. One sister is way too cool for that “old-fashioned” kind of stuff. My brother and his wife only like gifts that they can return to the store for cash. My other sister probably wouldn’t want one because she’s a fussy decorator. Little does she know – her new dog is going to get one!

My DH and son like what I make for us but it will become too much at some point. So I will make them for charitable organizations.

Although my next project is for my DH’s 85 yo aunt and cousin – they will LOVE it.

One of my sisters is like that. Oh well, her lose.

Absolutely. I would love to make a quilt for my sister, but she told me in no uncertain terms that quilts are not her style. So she is off my list. I give her a Starbucks gift card for Christmas and she is totally happy. Imagine, wanting a Starbucks gift card instead of a beautiful hand made quilt.

Almost everyone in my family would prefer to not have quilts. I think they don't get the connection, the love sewn into them. Ah well, I make them for myself and for gifts for others.

After gifting my good friend a blue and yellow queen sized quilt that matched her colours and decor, I was disappointed when she casually flung it over the back of the chesterfield (it's still there three years later) and barely mumbled thank-you. I'm now very careful who I make a quilt for and will not make them for silent auctions because they rarely even bring the cost of the fabric.

I now know that not everyone appreciates a quilt. That's their preference and if they really want a gift card instead, it makes my shopping very easy.

Oh yes. But that dose not stop me from making them. They still know how much work go into them. And They do not get anything eles for X-Mass other wise.

mine find the mistakes, very disheartening!

My family likes NOTHING homemade. GRRRR

One of my teachers told me a story about her DIL not wanting anymore "blankets". She told us to make sure the person was "quilt worthy" before putting the time, effort and $$$ into a quilt! After seeing a quilt at a resale shop that had the label on the back "Made with Love, Gramma Nelson" and the quilt had never been laundered, it broke my heart. I didn't have the $50 that the shop was asking for it, or I would have rescued it, even though the colors weren't something I would pick. It broke my heart.

I would make one anyways for one of them and choose the design with something they really like(for example...trains,butterflies, flowers). Make it an easy one. I'll bet they will love it and their enthusiasim may carry over to the others. If it doesn't work just make charity quilts where they are truly appreciated. Good luck....you could even make me one if you want and I will love it!...LOL

my boss told me once that anyone that "made" gifts did it because they were cheap. He didn't refuse the quilt I made hime for Christmas one year. My daughter and one brother like my quilts. I now am getting a new son in law who told me he LOVED quilts, and my respone, good I'm running out of people to give them to.

We all quilt for OUR OWN pleasure 1st! I don't like the jewelry that a friend spends hours creating, and I don't like the style of art that another friend paints. Just because someone puts hours of work and love into their art doesn't mean someone else likes it!

Quilts don't fit into everyone's style. My daughter has seen quilts she is blown away by because of design, color, workmanship, etc. She appreciates them but does not see one fitting into her decor. Once in awhile I will send photos of a pattern I think she might like, but so far she has not given the "green light." I will love making one for her after she selects the pattern and fabric.