if i just HAVE to say something that might be taken as critisizm i do it by pm, that way NOBODY else hears me so it should not be embarrassing, if they tell me to take hike, nobody knows! and the board is still at peace

I agree to a point, when I post something and ask for comments, I truely want honest opinions which includes constructive criticizm. Some advice I'll take, some I'll ignore - according to my desires and beliefs - but all constructive criticizm is appreciated even if not used.

A member (an experiencd quilter) posted several blocks the other day, the blocks had yet been joined together. She was looking for comments on the best layout. While she didn't specifically ask for constructive criticizm of the individual blocks *I* had noticed that some of the pieces in one block were flipped. Had it been my block I would have appreciated it being pointed out because that juncture it was easy to fix - so I did point it out to her, as did one or two other members. These things (brain fart mistakes) I think are appreciated when pointed out even if unsolicited. I would not however point out the same error on a quilt that was already quilted - why raise the dead?

When I see a pic of a first quilt or block by a new quilter, and their post starts with something like 'yippee - look what I did!' ... the block could be totally wonky but I wouldn't dare say a word. At that point of "oh my God I actually sewed a bunch of pieces together" - let them have that glory. I would prefer to see them retain that excitement and passion over the possibility of dashing it by saying it isn't right (which may make them think quilting is just too hard!). If they decide they love quilting they'll be seeing more quilts, the more they see the more they'll see the differences, and hopefully the more they will learn.

I agree to not offer constructive criticism or advice unless it is asked for. I also agree that false praise can be just as harmful as unsolicited constructive criticism. So it is best to just say nothing if you notice problems that can easily be rectified by changing or concentrating on perfecting a technique.

I agree with ,if you can't say something nice , say nothing at all. However; sometimes even when asked for an opinion I am apt to withhold because I'm often the odd man out...

I've seen quilts done by professionals that have made me cringe. I've seen quilts by beginners that just wowed me.

I won't ever critique someones work unless I've been asked. Then, as I've been taught in management classes, before giving advice, point out and praise what they did right.

I also try to follow my dear Aunt's advice, "If you can't find anything nice to say, it's best not to say anything at all."

I can't stand Picasso. If someone would ask me to say something nice, I would find it very difficult to say anything positive. But, if asked about Raphael, I could go on all day about what a fabulous artist he was. Yet both were famous. Go figure, I probably would be boo'ed out of a musuem! :roll:

Well, in person, things can be said gently, gauging the reaction of the quilt maker, to encourage and guide; or one may be able to see that even honest, gentle, constructive criticism will squash the budding artist, and thus only offer honest praise for what IS right. But online, even totally correct and kindly-phrased criticism can hurt and discourage. Tone, circumstances, so much cannot be conveyed online, so unless someone is asking for an opinion or frank assessment, I either praise what I honestly like, or move on without comment. I LOVE that this board is warm, kind, friendly, and non-judgmental 99.9% of the time. Other boards are not always so, and it's a shame. Let's protect what we are so fortunate to have here.

Well said.

Maia
Very well said! Much better than the way I said it.

I love this board and all the information that the quilters here are willing to share.

I consider someone a quilter if they have pieced just one block or a zillion quilts.

As a relatively new quilter, I was hesitant to post a photo of the last quilt I made simply because I felt inadequate compared to those who are so incredibly talented here. My quilt wasn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but it was something I made with love for someone I love. Even though I'm thick-skinned to a degree, if I had been slammed, it would have hurt and I would have thought twice about participating again. Not every quilt is going to be worthy of a professional class quilt show, but the fact that the individual made a quilt and took the time to share it here is worthy of a nice compliment or encouraging word. Kindness grows more kindness and I've seen so much of that on this wonderful board.

I can almost always see something good in a quilt. When it's impossible (rarely) I don't say anything.
I'm totally in love with the process and how something looks is really secondary to me.
I love "hearing" the joy or feeling of accomplishment "heard" by other quilters.