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-   -   how to handle a quilt shop moment (https://www.quiltingboard.com/main-f1/how-handle-quilt-shop-moment-t67942.html)

quiltmom04 10-04-2010 05:37 AM


Originally Posted by niftynickel
Had a embaressing moment at a local shop recently. And am at loss to get over my hurt feelings. I was participating in a monthly group and went to pick my materials but couldn't stay ( i guess you must pay if you don't stay ), I understood that if you didn't make the day and went later in the week you paid a nominal amount. But the clerk came to door and shouted across the parking lot asked ifwas I staying and of course no!!! was my response and she expressed her disappointment and the $$$ issue. I have witnessed others leaving without paying in passed months, I did go in and hand her the $$$. But I am crushed and feel like I was a shoplifter. I have been loyal to the local shops but it seems like everyone it getting a bit testy. Geez , I made a mistake, and others( guild friends seem to come and go as they please). Should I just get over it ???

Can you please explain? I don't know what you're talking about - what did you not pay for?

noveltyjunkie 10-04-2010 05:41 AM

I don't understand how these things work- you come in once a month and everyone works with fabric they buy on the day? And how do people usually pay? I have never joined anything like this but when I get flyers they always state the payment beside the activity. How did you hear about this club? They should have made their terms clear (and if they didn't, you should have asked). Sorry you were embarrassed.

darlin121 10-04-2010 06:11 AM

I read all the posts on this thread and have to agree that Raptureready really hit the nail on the head. Do as she suggest, talk to the lady and make a joke about it otherwise you will always feel like a "victim" of thougtfulness. Its Your quilt shop. Don't feel as though you can't go there anymore. Say something, not confrontational, and you will feel better. )))HUGS((

19angel52 10-04-2010 08:04 AM

oh goodness...that's a tough one. Read the posts - and the owner is touchy to talk to? How does she stay in business??? Uh hello - me customer, you owner...with me, there is no YOU. Pure & simple. I'd address it to the owner regardless of how touchy she is - and let her know how embarrassing it was to be singled out like that.....and if the reaction was unfavorable, kindly thank her and let her know that I wouldn't be coming back. Yeah - sounds good in my mind....hope I could put it into action! Good luck....and you have every right to be upset!

misseva 10-04-2010 08:34 AM

i would have paid and then told the clerk that i would never be back in that store again.

seamstome 10-04-2010 08:42 AM

This is at the core of my JCP thread that got locked. In the US today, do we expect too much from customer service in retail or do we receive too little or are our price/service expectations skewed?

Rapture gave you good advise. It is easy to have people take offense at a comment or action that is unintended. And it is just as easy to be in such a hurry that you dont think about what you said from the other person's aspect.

chamby 10-04-2010 09:04 AM


Originally Posted by niftynickel
Thanks because I have felt like crying all day!!!
It could be that Iam trying to finish a graduate course in record time too. I didn't say a word to this lady, and she is the one I really like in this shop. The owner is generally touchy so talking with her is definitely out. She scares me. I may just drop out of this monthly group and not join another at this shop.

If you are this uncomfortable with the people in the shop I would not continue to work with them. Seems to me they need a lesson on customer service and people skills. However, I would speak to the lady that yelled across the parking lot to you.

Quilter7x 10-04-2010 09:09 AM


Originally Posted by bearisgray

Originally Posted by Barb in Louisiana

Originally Posted by raptureready
I reread your post and you say that you really liked the woman that did this. Chances are that she really likes you to and felt at ease yelling across the parking lot to you. She probably didn't mean to cause you any distress. Speak to her about it. Be nice. Just tell her that you didn't realize that you had to pay if you didn't stay but that you wished she'd waited until the next time you came in and said something then because it really embarrassed you the way it was handled. But be nice, be understanding. She may have been having a really bad day.

Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.

This is the perfect way to handle this. I've learned that most often people really don't mean to hurt or humiliate you, but if you carry the grudge & the hurt, then they hang around your neck like a big chain. Hold your head up, march right in & enjoy yourself sewing. At some point, make sure you get clarification from the owners or the clerk, regarding the issue of paying. Perhaps some of the other sewers have arranged a tab & pay monthly?

These comments seem to make the most sense to me.

I totally agree Barb and Bear, Rapture hit the nail right on the head.

{{{hugs}}} for you NiftyNickel. Good for you for going back to school, too! :thumbup: I hope this situation gets cleared up fast so you can move on. This Quilting Board is a great place to be and we look forward to getting to know you more. :D

chamby 10-04-2010 09:09 AM


Originally Posted by raptureready
I reread your post and you say that you really liked the woman that did this. Chances are that she really likes you to and felt at ease yelling across the parking lot to you. She probably didn't mean to cause you any distress. Speak to her about it. Be nice. Just tell her that you didn't realize that you had to pay if you didn't stay but that you wished she'd waited until the next time you came in and said something then because it really embarrassed you the way it was handled. But be nice, be understanding. She may have been having a really bad day.

Please don't drop out. Make a joke of it at the next meeting. Just laugh about there really being quilt police and that they'll chase you down for a couple of bucks.
Other people can only make you feel bad if you allow them too. By not dealing with it you'll only end up full of resentment. Just take a deep breath, hitch up your big girl britches and get it over with so that you can move on.

Okay, I read this after posting my comment. I really like your response. So I agree that it should be handled in this manner. I think we forget sometimes to just hitch up our big girl britches and move on. Plus it is hard to just do this sometimes.

adrianlee 10-04-2010 09:23 AM

I would go back and talk with the clerk. Don't let it go because you will always be thinking about it from time to time. I had a similar happening and I went back to the store and confronted the clerk. No more problem.


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