Call her and say "Hi there I just came up with the figure of how much your pattern copy will be it's $???? It cost me the same thing and I know you'll love the pattern! How's that. I think it's polite and to the point.

you are right. copywrite is a big issue and we dont always think about it. Not only have you paid for the pattern. the designer is out her due when some one copies. I have been guilty in the past. but no more!!

My understanding is that you can sell/give/trade/lend books or patterns that are copyrighted, but it's illeagal to make a copy of those things.

I remember as a child and teenager trying to talk my parents into agreement on something I thought I wanted to do. When Mother wanted to stop me in my tracks she would say
"Right is Right and Wrong is Wrong, you decide."

I have a friend that does not like to pay to take classes as some of them can be pricey, so I don't mind paying for them, but she always says you can teach me. I usually just say someday, my schedule is pretty busy. We live quite aways from each other and she usually forgets. But on the other hand she always wants to share with me, so occasionally I do share, but it does gall me that she can be so cheap. I love her dearly, and I don't think she realizes that she is being cheap

You did the right thing. You said the designer is a close friend and the begger of free patterns is an acquaintance.
"Nuff said".

Time to put on your big girl panties my dear.

Simply say, "No, I am not going to share my pattern with you. Not only is it a copyright violation, but the designer is a good friend of mine, and I want her to get the revenue she deserves from her work. I will be happy to give you the ordering information so you can get the patterns yourself." And stick to it.

Why are people so afraid of being ethical now days? Most people seem to think "It's all about ME", not what is right. It is time for those of us who know better to grow some spine and stand up for what is right. And if other less ethical people "think less of us", so what?

I like this approach, adds humor to soften the blow, but gets the point across.

There are some good responses on this thread. hannajo (page one & p 5) is right on in her postings.
Which begs the question, can't the pattern just be shared, but not copied, which would then be legal?

I am with you. I would not have given her the pattern. As you tried to explain to your friend about the copyright, for you to give her the patter would be against the law. If it comes down to ending the relationship then I say she wasn't a very good friend. Jeanniebelle