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-   -   most are disappointed with reactions to gifting hand made (https://www.quiltingboard.com/main-f1/most-disappointed-reactions-gifting-hand-made-t85905.html)

Hosta 12-29-2010 06:44 AM

I swore off giving any handmade items to family 20 years ago. no one appreciated my work so I thought bleech on them. now I only give to others who really know the value and want the gift. so why do you keep torturing yourselves by gifting to those who don't appreciate them. They are not going to change. I hope I am not sounding rude but why continue to do it?

jamh 12-29-2010 06:52 AM

Those are just "material" people and will never be happy! They dont value hard work nor creativity! Do it for the ones you know who will value there treasures for ever!

Murphy 12-29-2010 06:54 AM

I suppose because we value these lovely gifts so much we hope for a change (sigh). You know the saying "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results".

Also, some of us don't have others to give to.

Treasureit 12-29-2010 06:54 AM

The sad thing is...I raised or grew up with those "rude" people! How come I came out so appreciative and they didn't! lol

Annaquilts 12-29-2010 07:01 AM

1 Attachment(s)
I have just the opposite. Both of the daughters that received a quilt this year were very happy. Just last night my 20 year old daughter came just before bed time and was hugging me and telling me how much she loved her new quilt. I had not seen it on her bed. Turns out she has a pile of blankets on her bed and the quilt is under it so it is close to her. LOL I made it for her to take to college so I thought maybe it was stacked some where to go. My 22 year old DD ( the eldest) received a similar quilt and she is using it on her bed as the top cover.

Waht I was happy about is that they were still very enthusiastic opening it eventhough they have seen me working on these quilts since this summer.

The 1 st daughter is behind the quilt being held up admiring it and the 2nd is smiling down on it.. they received similar quilts.
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joan_quilts 12-29-2010 07:12 AM

I don't like giving gift cards. My sister would send me a gift card, I would send her one. WHY?! If I don't know the person very well, or their taste, why would I give them something I worked so hard on?

I would rather a donation be made in my name for a charity rather than a gift card. I would rather give to a charity in someone elses name than give them a gift they don't want/need. That is just me.

From now on, when I gift a quilt, it will not be on Christmas. I think with all the hoop-la and buy, buy, buy being pushed down our throats, we get let down a lot easier.

feline fanatic 12-29-2010 07:12 AM

I have a feeling that many of us, at least I know I do, are constantly thinking of the person we plan on gifting to as we are making the item. I tend to fantasize about the intended recipient's reaction as I am piecing, quilting and taking that final stitch on the binding and label. I hope they will like the quilt half as much as I imagine they will. I have been so very fortunate in that every recipient of my quilts have been thrilled or at least given the appearance of being thrilled. I was even lucky enough to see a video of a charity quilt I made given to a little boy and the look on his face when he got it was worth more then I can say. The good reactions are sooooo worth it. I am currently working on a quilt for my brother. It is all hand quilted and when he comes to visit I show him the progress. He said one day "it really is a labor of love, isn't it?". That comment alone makes it all worth it for me. The quilt I just gifted to my DMIL, her reaction was better then anything I imagined.

The bad reactions, well I guess we just have to learn from that experience and know that not everyone appreciates our gifts from the heart nor do they realize all the time and effort we put into them. Maybe people have been conditioned by seeing the made in China slave labor quilts (and other items) at big box stores for sale for $30 equates to very little perceived value in our handcrafted item.

If we want recipients to truly appreciate and love our home made quilts the way we love them when we pour our hearts and souls into making them, then we need to know our recipients better. Of course, when we give to charity and an unknown recipient then we just put our faith in the cause.

crashnquilt 12-29-2010 07:20 AM

My heart goes out to those that don't receive the appeciation owed to them.

I am truly blessed with a family that loves the gifts that I make for them. They are so proud of them that they brag to everyone and anyone about them.

My niece LOVES purses and jackets. I make a sweatshirt jacket with matching purse for her a few years ago. When I went to visit, she told me that if I wanted to make another set like that she would gladly use it. She literally WORE OUT that set.

My family expresses their gratitude to me which is always wonderful. But I know they really like them when I hear them talk to other people with great pride in their voices stating that "this was made just for me by my (aunt or sister). She puts so much thought and love into everything."

The only thing I can figure out is the ones that don't appreciate hand made gifts are very "plastic" and materialistic people. I do feel so sorry for those kind. Seems like their goal in life is to be "1-up" to others and don't take time to TRULY appreciate life itself.

sueisallaboutquilts 12-29-2010 07:23 AM

All good points.
I only make for people I know will love them just b/c I made them. Those people are my family. They love things just because they were hand made. I'm the same way :)
But I feel for those of you who get disappointed.
Being family I know what colors they like etc but I honestly don't think it would matter. I'm lucky in this regard. I just wish I made more stuff. Too busy here??? lol

RkayD 12-29-2010 07:33 AM

I have found that there are people out there who don't understand how we can love doing this sewing thing. My grandma has always told me the story of her dad who said he could never understand how a woman could buy perfectly good fabric and cut it up into little bitty pieces just to sew it back again. To those its just a blanket...to us its a work of heart.


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