Go figure! I was so excited to learn my brother and his wife are expecting. I talked to her Sunday and asked her to let me know as soon as they pick their decorating scheme for the nursery. I went on to explain that I wanted to make a quilt for the baby but I want to make sure it's something they like, so I'd show her a few patterns to choose from and have her go with me to pick the fabric. She told me they were probably going to decorate the room with Pottery Barn furniture and accessories, and there's already a quilt to match so they'd just use that. I tried very hard to stay up-beat and not let her see how shocked/hurt I was, and I'm not going to let it ruin my fun and joy with this baby coming. But I really feel sorry for her that she's that concerned about coordinating things. Just wait until that baby is a few months old and everything's crazy!

My sweet DIL wanted everything to match. And it does beautifully. I made about 8 quilts for Olivia anyhow and she uses them too.

Yup, if she wants that...let her have that. I've known people like that, and really...I'm glad I didn't take the time to make one for them.

pdots...the kids I have made quilts for won't go anywhere without them...and they're 4-5 years old! A pottery barn quilt can't do that. Guar-un-teeeed.

There's been lots of posts about this very type of thing happening and the hurt that comes with it. _:-(_ Sorry it happened to you. Some people just don't get it, do they?!! The least she could have done was thank you for the thought.

Add her to your "will not make a quilt for" list. Wait for the baby to get older and make a really fun, colorful, quilt then. In this case, the kid will probably have better sense than the mother!

It's her loss. I agree that if that's what she wants, let her have it. She has no idea what she's missing out on. {{{{{hugs}}}}} for hurt feelings :(

LMFBO - just realized the advertisement at the bottom of this threat is for Pottery Barn! :-)

She sounds very immature. Just go ahead and make what you want for the baby, she will be glad she has a second quilt the first time the new born baby has a new born baby middle of the night potty accident. Remember those, where everything gets coated with slime....ugh and all you want is something clean and soft to wrap the baby in,,and not get it all over yourself...I remember those nights..I never took my baby out in their crib blankets, so you need several blankets..she will learn...

I would look at what she is doing with the room and make what you want. I had a baby shower with my first baby and got about 20 blankets. 10 were home made knitted ones. I have used every single one of the non-knitted ones in the middle of the night accidents. I wouldn't use the knitted blankets at night because they were too nice. I used them during the day because they were so pretty and let me tell you. I had two loads of laundry to do with my daughters cloths. One of cloths and one of blankets. I probably could have used more blankets because of spiting up and wetting out. She will come to appreciate the blanket that you make for her. My Daughter still has to sleep with her hand made quilt blankie every night. I have made one just like it for my son. very simple design. her was purple triangles and my sons was blue squares. She will be grateful for it when the baby is older. Just you wait and see. and enjoy the baby.

Make the quilt anyway and keep it at your house for baby to use when she comes to visit. Some people just deserve Pottery barn stuff!

Make the quilt. They may want to keep the Pottery Barn quilt in the bedroom and will certainly need another for the living room floor, play pen and for travelling with in the car.

You could make like a small carry along quilt that they can pack in the diaper bag for when they want to lay the baby down at someones house or for the baby to play on as it gets older. It wouldnt have to match anything.

Oh how sad.....I know I made my new GS 3 different quilts and now that he is a year they still won't let him sleep with any blankets.....I've stopped making them

Karen

wait till the first time baby figures out how to take off a poopy diaper in the middle of the night and all that pretty PB stuff gets "icked"! she'll be needing a few extra bankies I'm sure :)

It is aggravating and hurtful when NON-quilters or sewers just don't GET IT ! Many people just don't appreciate something handmade or without a designer label
I have a hard time with these perfectly-coordinated, overly-picky brides & moms-to-be today ...
Guess my AGE is showing, we were happy to get ANYTHING when we got married & had babies ... it didn't have to come from a designer registry or be matchy-matchy.
A gift is supposed to be a GIFT ... not a dictate from the recipient ... might as well just hand out cash to people ... sad
I've made numerous baby quilts for family & friends in 20 yrs. One niece of ours said "Oh, you MADE this?" but showed no more enthusiasm for it than the STORE BOUGHT gifts she opened ! But I still keep making them ... most are treasured & loved.
Make that quilt anyway - or make a birthday quilt when they are 2 or 3 (guaranteed to be loved) and who cares what SIL thinks ! :)

Alot of people don't appreciate the value of a homemade gift. They like the prestige of the brand labels instead, like with clothing nowadays.

I remember I made my very first grandchild (girl) one.
They lived out of state and I called my daughter to see if she got it. She told me yes, and that her DH and baby outside on it in the DIRT!....I was so mad,
Karen

The quilts we make and gift are filled with love as well as batting. If you want to make your niece/nephew a quilt filled with love you should do so. If you feel it will be hidden away at niece/nephew's house feel free to keep it at your house. If they live near enough you will be asked to baby-sit. The first time you baby-sit you can gift the quilt 'after' the parents have gone, use it while she/he is at your house and keep it when she/he goes home.
You may even have an opportunity over time to be spiteful if you choose. SIL: "Where did she/he get the quilt?".
You can then remind her she didn't want it because it didn't match the nursery decor.

That's ok. The child will outgrow a baby quilt. Let the nursery match. Time is on your side. Wait until your grandchild is about 4 or 5 and take him or her to the quilt store to pick out the fabric and make a quilt from that.

We used to take my grandson to the quilt stores ever since he was an infant. When he got a bit bigger we'd let him pick out some fat quarters (which he instantly turned into blankets for his stuffed animals). He had the best taste in prints I had ever seen. Anyway, one day I told him to pick out 3 fabrics and I'd make him a quilt. That quilt meant more to him than anything else because "I picked out the fabric and grandma made it for me".

Some people don't get it. Others think something hand-made is too good to use. I've seen both. Something tells me that a Pottery Barn lover wouldn't appreciate a beautiful quilt made with love. I like the post about taking the child when he/she is old enough to pick fabrics and make a wonderful one!
I don't understand your son though- having a quilting Mom should make him appreciate it. I'm not saying he should overrule his wife about the nursery but I'm surprised he doesn't want a quilt for his baby from his Mom. I have 3 sons and know they would like it. Just a thought.

Oh, well, it's her loss. Don't let it hurt your feelings anymore than it has already. I agree with the others. Sooner or later, you'll make the baby a quilt anyway.

My daughter and son-in-law are the same way. It has to be Pottery Barn and nothing else. I made the quilts anyway. Most have ended up on the shelf, but someday they will be happy they have them.

Make her one anyway! Who can't use more then one and one day it will mean something to that little one!

next time say "Pottery Barn hmmm? well, if you want to settle for that level of quality, I understand and oh by the way...at least you know what I make is made in America"

I agree with all the above. Just be glad you found out before you made it. Make one anyway, but be prepared to see it in a closet or on the ground. I think on the ground is better because at least it's getting used.

I personally would make an I-Spy quilt for the baby..in 6 or 7 months, it will be ready for it.
so sad this has happened to you. your SIL is rude. it happens to most of us. I am still waiting for 3 thank yous for 2 wedding quilts and 1 baby quilt. if i didn't have tracking on them, i would of never known they got it. it has been over 3 years,for one, and they all live out of state..family..humpth!
on the other hand, my DD's best friend asked me to make a baby quilt for her soon to be born son..i was so honored and touched,that she even paid attention to my quilts.

At least you didn't make the quilt, since the mom probably would have put it in the closet. Oh well, her loss. Make a quilt for someone who will appreciate it

your heart is in the right place. I agree with others who have said to celebrate the baby's birth with quilts. It feels so good to sew for the little ones. Maybe just hold them back for a bit until the mother can appreciate them, or donate them to a wonderful charity in the child's name. Give the mother a picture and card of what you've done ;-)

Make a baby quilt and donate it to a charity in their new baby's name. Send her a picture to let her know what she's missing.

I used to laugh and cry. When I was an interior designer- people wanted their houses to look like Pottery Barn catalogs. Euwww. I had clients who would rather pay a small fortune for a machine made pottery barn rug, than buy the original persian at a fraction of the cost. WTF? I think it is a lack of imagination and a desire to keep up with the Joneses. Neither of which suit me.

I'm assuming by your SIL's statement saying they'll "already have one" means that this is their first child - and she has no idea that they'll need MANY more than one. Personally, I think the looks of most Pottery Barn quilts are very pretty (please don't shoot darts at me anyone), and for those who don't quilt, or who lack any knowledge of quilting and therefore don't know how to truly appreciate a handmade quilt, the Pottery Barn type quilts are a suitable alternative. All of us here understand the difference in not only quality, but of creating something out of love instead of by mass production. If I weren't a quilter, I'd probably buy one of those for myself. But having the knowledge and appreciation makes all the difference, doesn't it? I'm sorry for your hurt feelings, but am glad she was honest up front about telling you. She could have chosen to politely accept your loving gift, then buried it in the back of a closet. I would be much more hurt by that type of response. I agree with the others that you should make a quilt anyway, but maybe judge the timing of the gift for when it will be more appreciated - when the PB quilt has worn out, has too many stains on it, or when mom and dad realize they NEED more than one, or when the child is older, . . . lots of opportunities may arise. Best wishes to you!

My daughter-inlaw said the same thing. So I made one and told her let her play on it. I use the Pokey puppy theme and gave her the book also

Guess that happens to a lot of us.I made a beautiful aqua Grandmothers Fan quilt for son's first child, made a matching pillow even, and thre DIL went the pottery barn way too. It hurt, but then it was for their house so I just kept the one I made at my house. Granddaughter stayed with me everyday, and lots of nights, so she had more use from mine than the PB. I still have her quilt at my house, saving it for her first child ( someday. I also made her coming home outfit, dress, gown and cap. I never got to see it on her, not even a picture wearing it. Then the second baby, a boy, was on the way and I was doing hand embroidery on a shawl , his name date etc., plus cute baby things. My son quietly told me that her mom had just learned to knit and made a plain blue shawl for the coming home cover. So, the day my Ty came home, I took it over to see him, took the shawl, and my son ( who really loved it) handed me the baby, and got a picture of him and his shawl. They ended up using it for a wall hanging, and when the divorce happened, the shawl managed to get back here( son wrapped baby in it to come visit me) for me to save for him. Both kids love the things I made for them, and they know it is being saved for their first child. So, you make one and keep it at your house, and when the baby visits you, he wilhave his or her, veey own special blanket and it will mean a lot to him to know that later on. By the time it is twoyears old, they will undo the nursery, and "their " choice will be gone and baby won"t even remember what his nursery looked like, but "aunties" special blanket will still be at your house to use.

there is no reason to be hurt. she isn't rejecting you. her taste is simply not evolved enough to realize what she's turning down. don't feel sorry for yourself. feel sorry for her.

don't waste your time, money and effort making something you've already been told is not wanted. you'll just feel badly all over again when it doesn't get used.

give her a pottery barn gift certificate worth half what you would have invested in the quilt. spend the other half on yourself. ;-)

brilliant!

Isn't funny how some people react when you offer to make them something handmade from the heart? Don't let it get you down or discourage you. Make a quilt for the baby when the baby is 3 or 4, when the baby can enjoy carrying it around.

Oh I am sorry :(

give it to her anyway -- one of YOUR choosing. She'll love it.

Reminds me of my mother....I have a wall decoration I'd made. She looked at it, screwed her face up and asked "WHY?"....I told her for the same reason she has sconces with POINSETTAS in them on her wall ALL YEAR LONG!!! Some people just don't have good taste...OR good manners!

Hey Sharon if it will make you feel better make me a quilt....anything you like...and you can bet your sweet petunia I would love it!!! ;-)

my SIL too rather have Pottery Barn than handmade.

Make the quilt anyway, my ex DIL was the same way, but used the hand made one. Besides who are you making the quilt for? Her or the baby?