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-   -   To stay or go...Applique Bee (https://www.quiltingboard.com/main-f1/stay-go-applique-bee-t140192.html)

gaevren 07-25-2011 01:33 PM

Pull the ladies you DO like aside one by one and ask them for their phone numbers- say that due to a scheduling conflict you won't be able to make the Bees anymore but that you would love to keep in touch and possibly get together again.

That way at the very least you don't lose them and you don't have to put up with the negativity anymore. And you could start your own small group if you wished.

Glassquilt 07-25-2011 01:36 PM

You have permission from all of the members above to listen to yourself. Nobody needs to go to a group with people whose outlook is so different from their own.

If you don't feel comfortable speaking about it, write it down, put it in envelopes, seal them and hand everyone a copy as you leave. Very hard to dismiss your insightful comments when written. It will give them something to think about & talk about. It may open their eyes. If it doesn't you're better off without them.

Forming a new group is an excellent idea.

Dianemarie 07-25-2011 01:38 PM

leave that group... I was in a local guild once - Charter member and it was my evening a month out. It started great and then stuff - gossip started and I couldn't stand it .. several of us couldn't stand it and we all left and started our own group at our time and kept our dues in a coffee can and hired people to come and teach us what we wanted to learn. Best group I ever belonged to ! We taught each other too; helped each other when tragedy struck we don't sew together anymore so many have passed and others aren't well but we keep in touch.
Love everyone of them ! Start your own group.

MadQuilter 07-25-2011 01:41 PM

So what kind of "advice" are you getting? If you don't feel comfortable in the general discussion, do you really feel comfortable asking for quilting advice?

Can you get advice here? I know there would be a ton of people here willing to offer their know-how.

I would have bowed out the minute it went from neutral territory to someone's home.

katyquilter 07-25-2011 01:44 PM

If you're not enjoying yourself, I say stop going. Life is too short to put yourself in situations you do not enjoy!

romanojg 07-25-2011 01:45 PM

I guess that I'm different. I think instead of just quitting you should say something first. You say you like the hostess and there are two ladies that have helped you alot. I would speak to the hostess; maybe she doesn't know how to do one of these and kind of lets it flow by itself. You can also ask the ladies that have helped you that if you quit can you call on them for additional knowlege; Be honest with them and let them know why. If you don't say why they'll all speculate; if you say something then at least you did try to make a change. Not all people read or can read other people; my motto is that if you don't say anything it's your fault it doesnt get any better; if speak up and it doesn't get any better then it's back on them and obviously they don't care enough to try and fix things.

NannaL 07-25-2011 02:49 PM

It happens within most groups I know it goes on at the one I belong to. It hurts,just stay to yourself for a while and maybe they will start thinking. Otherwise find another group
or start one of you own.

hobbykat1955 07-25-2011 03:11 PM

I'd be out of there in a NY min...Once it becomes "not FUN" whats the point.

loves_2_quilt 07-25-2011 03:18 PM

I would stop going, don't like being around whiners and complainers all the time.

blueangel 07-25-2011 03:51 PM

Ditto


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