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-   -   went to first guild meeting, felt like an intruder - what would you do? (https://www.quiltingboard.com/main-f1/went-first-guild-meeting-felt-like-intruder-what-would-you-do-t50457.html)

Late Bloomer 06-22-2010 06:36 AM

Ladies; Thank you so much for your input on guilds. I may consider joining one but only after checking out the ones near me. Now i know what to look for and will try to find a good fit for me. I do some volunteer work for our library so do not want to be away from home "gallivanting" too much as husbands do get prickly when they are home alone too long. We are both retired but sometimes it is good to get away. I volunteer at the used book store with two other quilters so we do go out to lunch monthly and have fun. They are the ones who turned me on to quilting. One of my buddies is 83 and quilts at the firehouse weekly, volunteers at the store once a week and also volunteers at another place a few times a month. Did I also mention that she knits hats for preemies in her "spare" time? She is a real inspiration to me. Folks like her keep me going although I am just a kid at 73. I am a self taught quilter and they have taught me so much. Glad I found this site as it is a wonderful source. Sorry to be so wordy - i have a tendency to do that.

amandasgramma 06-22-2010 06:38 AM

I live in a small town and have hesitated going to the guild! The LQS has a Friday gathering. I've been in the store and walked into the room and tried to talk to the ladies there.....they've pretty much ignored me. I know some of them belong to the guild - why would I want that same treatment? I've also been one to go to the local guild's quilt show....and have been treated as though I'm an intruder....again, why would I want that same treatment? THIS guild, online, works for me! I can go to a "meeting" when I want, dress like I want, and do it with NO makeup on!!! :thumbup: In another words, I'm SOOOOO glad I found this website!! You all are great! :mrgreen:

dollycathy 06-22-2010 07:30 AM

I hate "clicks" its like being back at school Why not start your own group for beginners they could probably learn something from you and then you won’t feel so overwhelmed there are probably others out there that have had the same experience with this group and are just waiting to find a group that is friendlier.

tryitall 06-22-2010 07:33 AM

I have heard that on here before. There have been Loads! of quilters that said they felt the same way. I think I will just keep my friends on this board and have fun. Hope to meet some of those near me.

tryitall 06-22-2010 07:35 AM

What chance?

SandyinZ4 06-22-2010 07:47 AM

I feel so lucky after reading many of these posts to know tha my LQG welcomed me with open arms. Now when we have a new visitor, I try to really make them welcome, too. Thanks for keeping me on my toes. Our Guild too has some quilts ladies bring for show and tell that are jaw-droppers. I would love to see some pictures of your dolls too but if that isn't allowed here, please put it on the non-quilting topic and then we can all see them. I was into dolls for 20 years and had a doll hospital (very few clients)but was sure fun to learn about them. Even tried making a couple that came out great. Let us see your little quilts, too. Pictures are always wonderful. I love this board!

bstanbro 06-22-2010 07:49 AM

My guild is like this. At first I was very disappointed because part of the reason for going was to make some friends. I've been a member for about six months now, and a few of the ladies are speaking to me a little more. At least they'll sit at the same table with me now.

I decided not to let them bother me. I like the speakers very much and I like the show and tell. I'm just a novice and these women are experts. Still, I'm not going to let that intimidate me. I'm proud of the quilts I make, and I don't care what anyone else thinks of them. I take great joy in making them, and that is what's really important.

We have a challenge going on that I'm quite excited about, and so there are a few things about the guild that I enjoy with our without enjoying the company of the women. I say go for the reasons that you like and forget the rest.

TexasGurl 06-22-2010 07:53 AM

Don't decide yay or nay after just 1 visit ... most guilds or groups will allow you to attend several times before asking you to join. Make another visit with your neighbor and see if things are different
Some guilds or groups are so used to their regulars, they forget to welcome NEW faces like they SHOULD ... shame on them!
I've been a member of 4 different guilds over the yrs. Guilds are great for inspiration & speakers - but I've always had the most FUN at small bees & a scrap group we had
DON'T be intimidated by the quilts either, there are ALL kinds of quilters in groups ... that's what makes it so interesting !

Sophie Strauss 06-22-2010 07:55 AM

Talk with the friend who took you there. Ask her if it's always like that. Quiet, contemplative, etc. If she says yes, then you have your answer.
Try to find an embroidery guild. The elderly (over 75) ladies at our church have an altar and rosary society. (I don't belong and probably wouldn't join.) You may contact one of the ladies, usually the president, and ask her where the embroidery group meets.
Perhaps post a note at the library? That's all I can think of at the moment.

DebraK 06-22-2010 07:58 AM

Write them off. I'm a big believer in first impressions if it involves a whole group. Life is too short to try to fit in with a group who made you feel that way right off the bat. You seem like a very nice person, I can't fathom why they weren't more welcoming.


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