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-   -   what do you say when somesone shows you their project (https://www.quiltingboard.com/main-f1/what-do-you-say-when-somesone-shows-you-their-project-t103751.html)

Rumbols 02-28-2011 11:06 AM

I once saw a quilt with bits of paper and string attached. I started to 'help clean it up' so the quilter wouldn't feel bad. When she said 'Don't you just love it? I was cleaning my sewing room floor one day and saw all this lovely stuff and it inspired me to make an art quilt.' I just smiled and said yes it looks very graphic. She just beamed. So the beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all. The quilter was so thrilled with everyone's reaction, she was going to make another. We quilters are a very diverse group.

Jackie54 02-28-2011 11:11 AM

there is always postive things to see.... beautiful colors , cratful pattern, "eyes of the beholder". The best thing is not say nothing if nothing nice to say. That is what my grandma always said. But I didnt learn that until way later.

MadQuilter 02-28-2011 11:33 AM

It takes a lot of courage to post or hang ones work and if the work gets verbally trashed, that person may get discouraged. I always ask: Who am I to be criticizing? If the person honestly doesn't know that the work isn't up to par, it is still not my job to point that out. Unless someone asks me for my opinion. That said, I have seen some cringeworthy tops which were bypassed quickly at a show - without comment.

susie-susie-susie 02-28-2011 12:01 PM

I agree with everyone on here. Why would you hurt someone's feelings on purpose. There is no need to make a critical comment, and there is always something nice to say. I believe that if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.
Sue

Marge L. 02-28-2011 05:32 PM

The old saying, 'If you can't say something nice, say nothing at all". That's the way I learned it.

JackieG 02-28-2011 05:36 PM

I always compliment their work. If they are proud to show it off, there must be something to like about it. Artistry is as unique and individual as we are.

DogHouseMom 02-28-2011 05:41 PM

Read a great piece of advice on this before (as it applies to show dogs - another subjective "art"). You say ....

"You must be very proud".

Also learned (also from dogs) is that unless someone specifically asks for my opinion, I keep it to myself. If they ask, I first try to meter whether or not they can handle the truth before opening my mouth.

cathyvv 02-28-2011 05:41 PM

How about, "You must be so proud of your quilt!"

After all, if it's in a show, the maker is proud of it!

I posted this and then saw that the post above mine says the same thing. Great minds and all that stuff...

cctx. 02-28-2011 05:58 PM

Everyone is unique whether it's beautiful or ugly; we are all artists and not every body sees the true beauty in a product.
What I would say is, your work is really unique.

NannySandy 02-28-2011 06:22 PM


Originally Posted by jljack
Funny you brought this up right now. I said "yes" to quilting a quilt being made by a very close friend's mother. The mom had a stroke a few months ago, and my friend said her mom was struggling to complete the quilt top. It's for a wedding gift.

Well, they brought me the top on Saturday. It brought tears to my eyes, as I could just see the struggle the lady had finishing the top. It was a very simple pattern with many uneven seams, puckers, folds, open seams. It would not lay flat no matter how I patted and tugged. I spent yesterday gently taking the borders off and separating the rows so I can at least straighten them enough to re-sew them together. It is obvious that the machine she used was having tension issues, as there were knots of thread and very uneven stitches.

Anyway, I will NEVER say a word to my friend or the mom about me fixing some of the issues. I can't do them all, because I would have to take it completely apart. I love the effort that she put into this top, and the amount of love she showed by that effort. Her struggle is written all over that top, and it is to be cherished. My goal is to make it a useable quilt, not to re-do her work. Hopefully they will not notice that I straightened the seams, and will just think that I did a great quilting job!! :thumbup: :D

BTW, I had quilted one of her previous quilts, and it was really quite good. She is home-taught by her mother, and has been making her quilts for several years.

GOD BLESS YOU! Sandy


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