I'm getting ready to fly up and visit my family in WA on Thursday and I've got the bargello I made all folded up and ready to give to my mom. For some dumb reason I'm having a really hard time with letting it go. I suppose it's because I lived and breathed that quilt for a month solid trying to get it ready to take with me. That's the only reason I can think of because I really don't like the quilt for myself. The colors aren't ones I'd pick out for myself, and I have no use for it. It was intended for my mom from the get go so it's not like I ever once thought about keeping it.

Does anyone else have this issue with gift quilts, or am I just goofy?

Every so often I make one for someone else, and have a hard time giving it to them. It's usually because I invested so much of myself in making it perfect for them that I feel like a part of me is going with it. I'm sure your Mom will be so happy with this quilt, and that she will appreciate all you did for her.

I'm having the same issue. I made a t-shirt quilt for my cousin from her deceased husbands t-shirts. I HATE it. All the way thru the process, I haven't been happy with it, but I sure dont' wanna drop it in the mail to her. I think its just because we spent so much time on them???
In my case (probably not the same for you), I'm assuming it'll be packed away in a box and never thought about, let alone seen again.

Maybe it's 'gift letdown' you know, you put your heart and soul into that beautiful quilt, some people ( me) get the same feeling on Christmas morning; what do you have to look forward to? or, now you're in 'transition'; behaviorists will tell you any meaningful transition is difficult, just recognize it for what it is, know that the feeling will pass, and move on. You did beautiful work, lovely presentation.

I'm thinking it must be the time invested issue. I know for sure my mom won't pack this away in a box. She'll gush and "ooh" and "ahh" over it. She'll probably leave it laid out on the floor for two weeks so she can look at it whenever she walks by the living room. Then she'll talk about it in every conversation we have for the next 6 months.

I sure hope your cousin appreciates your quilt and doesn't just pack it up. Good luck getting it in the mail! :)

I agree, sometimes it is just hard to part with my "babies"!

I feel the same way. You love making them and you are so proud of your accomplishments, it's hard to let go, but sometimes you get to see them displayed with as much love and pride as you felt. I hope this makes sense, I haven't had supper yet, so when my stomach is empty, my brain doesn't work that well. LOL!!! BTW your quilt and how it is gifted is very pretty!!

Kathi in PA

:thumbup:

If I have a hard time parting with it, it is because I wonder if they are really going to like it. Even though I only give my things to people that appreciate the work.

I so know what you are saying.

Now I keep a data sheet with each project. Hopefully with a picture as well although I'm not much of pictures. This way I can remember all the love I put in each one.

Well now you've gone and made it all pretty with a bow...now it's going to be even harder to give away :) She is just going to love it!! You'll probably feel so much better about giving it away after you actually do it because she'll be so appreciative!

Will your mom think you did a good job on it? Sometimes we are worried that our work might not be good enough. And in reality, the parent really loves it. /that happen to me with a oil painting I did for my mom, But I went ahad and gave it to her,and she hung the painting in a place that I thought was not where I would hang it, a few years later she said she always liked that picture where she could look at it while she did dishes....funny

You made a gorgeous quilt. If I had made it I would feel the same. The last one I made I left it out to look at for quite awhile before I sent it off. At least you have visiting previleges! :-D

A good part of you is in that quilt, it sure seems likely it is hard for you. Beautiful!

Thank God you still have your Mother! She worked many years raising you, she will treasure your creation and if you think its hard to part with a quilt...wait until the the kids leave home!

I know what you mean. Sometimes it's like giving away part of yourself. I get sentimental about my quilts, too. I spend a lot of time and effort on them to get them just right.

I sounded harsh earlier, I am sorry. My mom died 2 years ago and I wish she was here now. She would just love looking at your pretty quilt and all the others. You aren't really giving it away...she will keep it for you, let her "borrow" it fora while.

That is a lovely presentation, am sure it will mean alot to your Mom.

DH had a hard time with one of my last ones. I made a Bento Box for my cousin's daughter. It was a wedding gift. DH wanted to keep the quilt and buy the couple a toaster instead. He still misses it. Guess I should make another for him so he will stop whining. :lol:

Yeap, every now and then I feel like I have to have the quilts I've made for someone just pulled away from me, as I don't want to let go!

The airplane quilt I made for my DGS Hunter was one, and then the argyle one I just did for my DDIL was another... Well ALL of them actually! lol!!!

For me, I think it's a combination of the amount of time I've put into them, and that they turned out so well (in my opinion anyways) I totally impressed myself, and didn't get enough time to really just gaze at them before they left! :)

Wills' Grammy, I'm so sorry for your loss. Warm hugs to you.

I can so relate to your feelings. I have worked for a year and a half on a quilt for my son and his wife. It is now finished and it is going to be very hard for me to let go of it. I picked out the colors for them, the prints on the fabric, everything with them in mind, and I REALLY want them to have it, but it does feel like a part of me. I designed it and layed awake many nights trying to figure out the next section, everytime I look at it I am kind of amazed that "I did that"!

No problem yet. I've given away all the quilts I've finished. The cutest one was hard to part with, but was the most important of all the gifts because it was for a sick child. Once I sent it and he received it, I was totally fine. I haven't had a moment's regret. I bet it will be the same for you with your bargello gift for Mom.

You didn't sound harsh, no appology needed. I am very sorry for your loss. I am very lucky to still have both my mothers, real and step. I know that someday they will be gone so I try and make the most of the here and now.

Was that the Bento Box that you posted pictures of trying to decide which way to position the blocks? I think I'm thinking of the right person! I really loved that quilt!

Yes , thank God you still your mother. She will treasure the quilt. It will be just like yo are hugging your mom every day.
Beautiful quilt.

I love making so many of them. It's like I get attached and don't want to let them go. It's hard sometimes.

I am to outspoken always have been. I have found the more you give the more you receive. You are holding an angel in your avatar. I love babies.

Aww, yes..I have the same trouble but only sometimes. I think it has to do with the amount of love you put into the project to begin with. If the giftee is someone you REALLY love, you put more into the project, then the project is Really loved too....makes it harder to part with...just MHO... Your Mother will absolutely love that quilt though!

Wills' grammy is right about having still having your mother. I, too lost my mother just about a week before I lost my husband.
You will be attach to the quilt because you invest so many hours into it and it seem to becomes a part of you, but think of the pleasure your mom will have to get something from her daughter. By the way it looks beautiful. Your mom will love it.

I'm sure once you see the love for the quilt that your mom will have you'll know the beautifal quilt you made for her will be loved and cherished.
Where in Washington does your mom live?

All my family lives on the western side of WA. My dad and step mom live in Elma which is waaaaay west, in Grays Harbour county. Almost to the Pacific. :) My grandma and other family live in and around Olympia. That's where I was born and mostly raised, though I spent a few years in Alaska and my high school years up in Federal Way (yuck, WA is great but I can't stand the SeaTac area). I love Eastern WA, we spent many a camping trip over around Moses Lake. My husband has this silly idea that if we ever moved to WA, we'd live in Yakima. I really don't know what his hang up is with Yakima, other than the fact that he spent some time there as a boy during summers.

It'll be a lot easier, once you see the look on your mom's face opening it up.

I,Too have a hard time letting go sometimes. I try to live ith the quilt a few weeks, and maybe even sleep under it once just so a little of it can remain in my pshyche. Our quilts are filled with so much love and we invest so much of ourselves in the. I have a quilt that I bought in a junk shop in Roanoke, Va. It was made from many orphan blocks and where the quiltmaker didn't have enough blocks she filled in with a whole feed sack. She did not have batting so she used feed sacks sewn together and the backing was all feed sacks. That was my motive in buying it, to canablize it for the feed sacks. I literally coudn't bring myself to do it. I had mental pictures of this woman in a mountain cabin making a quilt to keep her children warm. Now when I feel "puny' I sleep under it and wrap myself in it because I know it is filled with love Anne in Richmond

Every little piece of fabric I put into a quilt, every little fussy-cut, every llittle binding stitch is a part of me. I have totally bonded with the quilt. But all I had was some material, thread, an idea of how it was goint to turn out and went for it. There were a few mishaps along the way, but for the most part I was very happy the way it turned out. Then I gave it away. Very much like our son.

The only sad thing is that I have made a lot of quilts, given a lot away, but I only have one son. But, in return, he gave me a wonderful daughter in law and three grandchildren. I still bond with the quilts. Always will, I guess. And then I get going onto something else, always knowing I can look into my journal and remember. Edie

Last week I posted a photo of my granddaughter's 16th birthday quilt, Color Falls. Although I've made quilts for a while, I'm not yet accustomed to gifting them. I was reluctant to give it to her since she has no clue as how much goes into making a quilt. She did thank me but isn't a gushy kid so I wasn't really sure she liked it. The very next day her mother, my daughter, told me my granddaughter wanted to hang her quilt in her bedroom since it's so pretty and she wanted to look at ofter. As you might expect I was thrilled that I had given it to her, that she truly appreciated it, and I felt vindicated.

I believe I've finally become a true quilter who can give away her precious work and feel appreciated for it. You are giving away a piece of yourself and some of us find that very difficult. You can visit your gift every time you visit it's receiver. Let it go and get busy on your next masterpiece!

No wonder, that is a beautiful quilt, Your mom will enjoy it so much. I wish I was your mom.

Cookie

I am so happy to hear your comments about having such separation anxiety with your quilts. I have a whole closet shelf plus pcs. on pant hangers that I just keep piling up because I love the process of making them but have no place to use them. I do rotate things but how often can you do that.

I find that if I make a quilt or pc. specifically for one person in mind, then I have no prob. parting with them. I just finished my very first flannel quilt & every stitch was done with love for the person it's intended for. I figure I can always do another one if I love it so much it's hard to part with. Can't do duplicates though with so many new patterns facing me.

I feel so proud of myself for figuring out how to add pix. that I'm sending one of the flannel rail fence.

Pat

I just gave away my first quilt and I had a hard time with it, it is something you work on and feel attached too whether you like it or not you still feel that attachment.

I am making 3 quilts this year and one is a gift for my parents for Christmas and I know that will be difficult to let go of!

Until I started quilting, I don't think I understood the meaning of "putting your heart and soul into it". That is what we do when we make a quilt...then we part with it. It's a loss to us when a quilt goes to a new home. When my FIL passed away, my SIL gave me back the quilt I made for him. I treasure the making of the quilt, the gifting of the quilt, his use of the quilt and it's return to me. It is a very special quilt to me. Not the most fancy, or even my "best" effort, but it was part of me, then part of him, and now I somehow feel like he is still near us.

I have easily given quilts away and then there are the ones I just cannot seem to let go of. I made one quilt for each, for a very close friends two girls that had babies. No problem giving the one quilt away, but for some odd reason I had a problem giving the other away. I think it was that one daughter made it very clear that she appreciated her family and what others people did for her. Whereas the other was a...well a bet selfish and I wasn't sure she would love it as I did when making it.

Then there was one I made for a friend a Krazy kat quilt...I decided she wasn't ready for the quilt and all the work I put into it either. I didn't think that she any idea how much I put into that quilt! So I wasn't ready to just hand it over to her. When she went into the hospital I knew it was the right time to give it to her. The day we took her home, I gave her the quilt to cuddle with on the way home. She loved the comfort it gave her and the timing was right. She often tells me how much it meant to her to receive such a gift at the time. It gave her comfort and it gives me comfort that she does appreciate it.
We put our hearts and souls into making a quilt let alone the time it takes to do so…we only want the best for it and the people who will receive the gift.

Maybe this will help - I made a quilt for my folks' 50th anniversary. They're gone now, but I sleep under that quilt every night when I'm in AZ. You'll probably get your mom's quilt back some day. And you'll remember all the love that's in it from her and you.