My dh and I decided we would buy our tombstone together and not leave this task to our children. He is going to put his USMC emblem or such on it and suggested I could put a little sewing machine or quilt on my corner. I like the idea but is this weird?

Not at all. It's more the trend now. Saves those left behind from extra responsiblity and stress.

Not weird at all. I think it sounds perfect and very thoughtful. Your children will appreciate it someday.

Not weird! And having recently buried 3, it is great that you are being thoughtful enough to take care of this ahead of time.

It's not weird at all and it will represent the real you and your DH. Your loved ones now will understand and those in the future will know a little about who you were. :)

So you're question is not about if it's okay for you and your husband to design the tombstone yourself, but it it were strange to have a quilt or sewing machine on the stone, right? I think this is a lovely idea! Absolutely wonderful!

We are planning to do the same. My parents (still living) have theirs on the plots already. They also blessed us with the gift of pre-planning their funeral. That takes care of everything, even transporting to the cemetery, which is in another state. I hope to be able to do that for our children, but will need to wait until our youngest is out of college and independent of us.

Another thing our family has started doing is including on the back of the stone 'Proud Parents of...' and including all the children's names. This will aid in geneology research at some later time.

Great idea..why let someone else make those decisions for you? With an elderly Mother not in the best of health, I am keenly aware how important it is to make any decision while you can. My parents were always going to do it later and now the response to any question is "just do what you all want". Mother thinks it is sick we've already taken care of final arrangements for ourselves. Love the idea of "the Proud parents".

Nope, most people now a days buy their own so the kids dont have to. And in my extended family they wont. The kids take the money and run. I think its a good idea. My parents bought mine and theirs when my brother passed. That way we could all be in the same place, a small cementary outside of town on a hill under a tree.

You say your DH was USMC, so is he eligible for burial at a National Cemetary? I thought most who served are. If he is then the plot and a head stone they provide are free to you. They will place both of you him in front you in back and engrave the headstone the same, he will be on front, you will be on back.

Not weird at all. My DH will probably bury me with a sewing machine, just so he'll have one less to deal with when I'm gone. :mrgreen:

Yes, it is the sewing machine emblem that I wonder if would be weird. Yet why not!

That is a splendid and very appropriate idea. You are thoughtful to do this now.

I like that idea. I want to be cremated since my parents are buried in one place, my first hubs in another state, current hubs's wife is somewhere else, both his parents are in separate places, and we're in a differnet state altogether.

I just want a spot with my parents & 1st hubs - there is a place for me there - dont want the whole thing, only a small space on his grave for a very small stone -(not to be buried) and s tone with a solar cell and a voice/motion sensor so I can record"Hey! Watch were you're standing!" when anyone walks to close to those graves! They all had a sense of humor! I think they would like it sharet

I think its a great idea! When my dad passed a few years ago he had most of it planned down to every detail. The few things he left were a little easier to handle..but not much. We did pass by a cemetery last week and I caught the glimpse of horses running on the back of a tombstone. I thought it was great!

Think it is a great idea. When my Dad died we put the Army emblem on his stone. He was a 22 yr. lifer. Mom said where should it go, since it is a double stone, I told her to put it in the middle since she served the 22 years right along side of him.
I love the idea of having a quilt on your side. I'll have to remember that. Also like the idea of children's names on stone also.

I think it is the Duchess of Bedfordshire (in the UK) who commissioned her coffin especially, and she uses it in her bedroom as a blanket box in the meantime!

Yes, that is what we were thinking "proud parents of" but I think if the sewing machine or quilt was done tastefully it would be good. I like an idea of a quilt to take with me to keep me warm...now I am getting weird.....

Yes, that is what we were thinking "proud parents of" but I think if the sewing machine or quilt was done tastefully it would be good. I like an idea of a quilt to put on the stone to take with me to keep me warm...now I am getting weird.....

I like an idea of a quilt to put on the stone to take with me to keep me warm...now I am getting weird.....[/quote]

I made a lap quilt for DH's grandmother with blocks for each grand and great-grand child. When she died I told mother-in-law to leave it on her. She "wore" it for the viewing and we sent her on her way still covered by the quilt she loved.

No it is a good idea. I have already done that. It takes a burden off your children.

It's not weird at all. It's good planning. It takes the pressure of the ones you leave behind.

Thanks everyone! Will plan on doing that now!

My adopted father did pick out the gravestone for my adopted mom and made it double so his information could be added later. It was very touching. For us 7 kids, it was very nice because it was one thing less we had to struggle over.

Not weird to me either.

Don't think it's weird at all. I think a sewing machine or quilt block is a great idea. It lets people know something about you. My parents have preplanned everything. They have their plots & the stone is already on it. Everything is engraved except the date of death of course. And they put the names of their children on the back of the stone. I'm thankful to them.

My cousin was a well-known potter and had a drawing (which she drew herself) of a potter on her business card. Her family put the same drawing on her headstone with the words "Still Potting" under the drawing. Her husbands had a drawing of a WWII plane and the inscription "Still Flying" on his headstone.

I think your idea is just fine!

My great aunt and uncle have their tombstone up and they're both still kickin'....and it has a giant picture of their RV on the back.

My mom and dad got theirs and had all the info they wanted on it (except their death dates) while they were still around. Was really nice we didn't have to try to guess what they would want.

Not weird. Its a very good way to get what you want, and it will mean more to your family that you picked it out.

My DH the dog and me our ashes will be scatered in the ocean or gulf of Mexaco my DS knows what to do and I have him on my cd so there is money to take care of it.

My sister-in-law had a picture of my brother in his midget race car put on his gravestone. I think it is a great idea. He was also buried in his racing suit holding a black/white checkered victory flag.

:thumbup:

We keep talking about doing that too. I don't want my children to spend what little money I have to bury me. We want all the decisions made and paid for.

No it isn't weird, it is quaint and helps say something about you; just as the marine corps emblem with say something about your husband.

No, I don't think that's weird. Personally, I like to go to cemetaries and wander around looking at the really old headstones and also the ones that have added extra personal touches like you are thinking about. Does that make me weird?

I think it is a terrific idea. Since I don't want to be stuck in the ground somewhere I plan to be cremated and then my late hubby and I will be scattered off a beautiful mountain or scattered on the ocean....I want to be with the birds or the beautiful fishes. Hope I can make up my mind soon and then not be concerned anymore about it.

I think everything that you prepare just makes it easier for the loved ones you leave behind. And a quilt in the corner of the stone would be very attractive. It's kind of a warm fuzzy kind of thing for people to remember when they visit you.

I truely appreciate when people don't trun their heads away from the inevitable. Being prepared is one of the kindest things you could do for the family. I think it is a cool idea to have preperations at hand.

I really like the idea of your DH. I think he rocks!

One very important thing to keep in mind for everyone is that instructions should never be kept in a safty deposite box because no one can get into them in a quick way. All instructions should be kept in a place where the whole family knows where to find them. And I think several copies are a good idea too.

My MIL lived with me for forty years. She was 95 and now resides in a pretty wood box and shares the sun porch, my quilting and her rocking chair. We have great conversations! My only problem is who will care for her when I'm no longer here!

NOT WIERD-----

how great! My grandfather put tulips across the bottom of his tombstone - he was known in town for having a large patch of tulips.

I think a quilt would be pretty.