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Thread: Unacknowledged Gift

  1. #1
    Super Member Lneal's Avatar
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    Just wondering what some of you would do in my case.

    I sent a gift to my sister in law about a month ago and still have not received any acknowledgement from her about it. I am assuming she got it, but I don't know if her silence is an indication that she really doesn't like it or what. It was a lap sized quilt. What do you suggest I do?

  2. #2
    Moderator tlrnhi's Avatar
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    I would contact her and ask if she got it. Tell her you are just checking to make sure in case it may have gotten lost in the mail. Once she tells you whether she has it or not,,,,if she does, I'm sure she'll tell you if she likes it. If she doesn't say anything other than she rec'd the package, I would take it as..she didn't like it.

  3. #3
    Super Member Lneal's Avatar
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    Thanks for your advice. I just called her (to make sure it didn't get lost in the mail) and she said sorry she meant to get a card out to me, but SHE LOVES IT!! Fits her couch perfect and it is beautiful! I just wasn't sure the best way to do it, so Thanks again for your help!!

  4. #4
    Moderator tlrnhi's Avatar
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    I'm glad you called her and found out she likes it.
    I'm sure that's a HUGE weight off of you.
    I had to do the same with the gift that was sent to my mother in law. Knew she got the package since father in law told me, but didn't know if she liked it or not. So, I sort of played dumb....asked her if she got the package and yes, she did and of course, she LOVED it!

  5. #5
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    Glad you found out she got it AND liked it! I often do the same thing~~play dumb "just wanted to make sure it got there" OR "did you mail that check? I never got it, wanted to make sure it didn't lost in the mail".....Works like a charm every time :)

  6. #6
    Super Member beachlady's Avatar
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    Kill them with kindness. Glad she liked it!

  7. #7
    Super Member LucyInTheSky's Avatar
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    I always call or email to make sure it arrived safely, just because I'm paranoid about the post office losing it.

  8. #8
    Super Member Oklahoma Suzie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lneal
    Thanks for your advice. I just called her (to make sure it didn't get lost in the mail) and she said sorry she meant to get a card out to me, but SHE LOVES IT!! Fits her couch perfect and it is beautiful! I just wasn't sure the best way to do it, so Thanks again for your help!!
    Glad she got it, and loves it.

  9. #9
    Super Member sewNso's Avatar
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    you know, what ever happened to the common curtesy of saying 'thank you'? golly gee, that would hurt my feelings.

  10. #10
    Power Poster amma's Avatar
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    I am glad that you found out that she liked it :D:D:D
    Great advice Terri!!!

  11. #11
    LUV2QLT's Avatar
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    When my kids were living at home, I always made sure they mailed out a thank you for gifts they received in person or in the mail. But now that they are on their own, and some with kids of their own, mailed thank you's are a thing of the past. I never get thank you's from them for any gifts - big or small - except for the ones given in person - of which I receive hugs & kisses and thank you's at the time. But if I mail something to any one of them, I finally break down about one month later, call them and ask if the gift was received - at that point I will get a verbal thank you out of them! And it's not just my own kids that don't send thank you's - it's their spouses and their children too! Ahhh, what's a mother (and grandmother) to do?

  12. #12
    Power Poster Jingle's Avatar
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    I either hand deliver a few of the ones given, Granddaughter has hand delivered the ones to several of her friends that I have given them to and I either get thanked in person or they call to thank me. I have U.P.S. some to a very dear friend and she immediately emails me to tell how beautiful they are and how much she loved them, she has 5 of my quilts. I sent her daughter and 5 kids each a quilt and they all sent beautiful cards, even the boys loved them and of course the 3 girls loved theirs also, they all use them to watch TV. That is the best ever.

  13. #13
    Super Member DeniseB's Avatar
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    My husband has four sisters, 3 older than him and one younger. they do not exchange gifts for b'days or christmas. the youngest is a brat. my husband carves and every year he sends each sister a carved snowman for christmas. each year it is a different design. his 3 older sisters always call thank him and tell him much they like it. he has been doing this for 9 years. anyway the brat never calls or says thank you. we always find out she got it from one of the other sisters and we know she likes it becuase she tells the sister she does. i will never call her to ask, if she doesn't get thats too bad.

  14. #14
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    I made sure my kids sent thank you notes too but now that they are grown they say no one sends thank you notes by mail, all their friends have email or text cell phones. It's too much ado to find paper, pen, envelope, stamp and get to the post office or post box. I guess they have a point. Nothing we can do to make the younger generation think their way is not acceptable.

  15. #15
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    I still say that thank you notes are important in personal and business life. The person who makes the effort to say thank you is often the same person who is remembered when opportunities arise. Of course, the acknowledgement needs to be sincere.

    I have a part of the family which neither acknowledges receipt of gifts nor says thank you. This is very diappointing to the biological father who states his child is acting exactly how he, himself had acted when raising him.


    My biological children and grandchildren have taught my husband how to express gratefulness. His son is stepping up to the plate in so many areas, I will continue to be optimistic about this area, as well. :-)

    Right now, I will continue to do things because I want to and not expect anything in return. I have struggled with frustration over this in the past. Believe me, when I say struggled....:-(

  16. #16
    Super Member zyxquilts's Avatar
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    I've been lucky in thank yous. My niece has always made sure that her 2 boys sent thank you notes. When the oldest one got to be about 16 or so, I told him that as long as he always sent me a thank you note or called, or told me in person, I would continue to give him prezzies - otherwise, they would stop when he turned 18. He just turned 21 & he's still getting gifts! His little brother is just 10, so I figure I'll tell him the same thing in a few more years. :D

  17. #17
    Super Member jljack's Avatar
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    Kay, I understand how you feel. My children acknowledge my husband with affection and thanks when he does something for them...they buy him birthday and father's day gifts and cards, and include him in Christmas gifts also. My husbands 2 boys (both in 20s) do not acknowledge me with gifts at all...not birthdays, Christmas, or mother's day. Their mother passed away in 2002, but I guess they never got over that. Anyway, I just try to ignore that they are inconsiderate, and I join my DH in giving their birthday and Christmas gifts. I even made each of them a bed sized quilt a couple of years ago. They said they liked them and thanked me, but have never given me a gift in return. Oh well, I hope they improve with age!!! :wink: :lol: I also keep praying for them!!!

  18. #18
    Super Member omak's Avatar
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    I made a laprobe for my DIL's mom ... have never heard what she thought about it, one way or another. *shrug shoulders* ... it was hers, I made it for her - - if she never says anything about it, no skin off my teeth, since I didn't intend to make more than one for her anyway ... when we were first married, my DH taught me that I would always be happier doing what I wanted to do for others with no thought about getting something back ... and, he was right.

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