a sensitive quilt question
#111
Definitely a comfort quilt. Yes, it's her mother, but that can be a difficult relationship. My mother died almost 10 years ago, and if someone gave me a memory quilt, it would go straight to the bottom of my closet and never see the light of day. A comfort quilt will reflect the love and care you have for your SIL.
#112
Yes you should go ahead and reach out to your friend. Since depression and all that goes with it can leave loved ones left behind greiving in a special kind of way.
This is why you should Especially do something for her. Others will go away from her because they don't understand. This gift of love from you will give her a sense she is not alone in her greif
This is why you should Especially do something for her. Others will go away from her because they don't understand. This gift of love from you will give her a sense she is not alone in her greif
#113
I think your arms and just listening to her for at the moment would be good at the moment. A quilt later on when the hurt and anger calms down. Been there with a family member so I know what it feels like first hand.
#114
I would go with a small cuddle quilt now and in giving it to her tell her that if she would like it you could make a memory quilt. That way if she is the one to go thru her mother's things, she could save anything that would have special meaning. If she has a negative reaction, just drop it. That way there is no sense in going to all that work if she has no desire for it but knows that you are thoughtful enough to be willing to make one for her if she would want it.
#115
I am one who has experienced first hand depression and the things that go along with it. I really don't know how the loved ones feel. It's just that most of our society has no clue about what happened, leaving the loved ones out in the cold. If they seem receptive, reach out, otherwise, watch for the right moment.
#116
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 1
About the Memory Quilt. I make quilts for people who have lost a loved one from the loved one's clothing. That is later though.There is a book out about Quilted Prayer Shawls. I do not know the name but I am sure you could look it up. She could cuddle with that when she is feeling down.
#118
I too think a comfort quilt would be nice. It is too early to make a memory quilt and may even find that it might be too painful even in the future. That is something you will have to decide as time passes.
#119
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 554
My SIL lost two sons within 2 years and a daughter n law was murdered in the Samson Alabama massacre in 2009 (my niece) And I am just now making her a memory quilt for Christmas.It takes time especially if the relationship wasn't a good one so I would suggest like the others... give her time.Make a nice warm fuzy cuddly(spelling?) quilt!
And just be there for her:)
Also you have my condolences :| Hugs.
And just be there for her:)
Also you have my condolences :| Hugs.
#120
I think a comfort quilt would be more appropriate. It sounds like there may have been some issues between them in the time before her death. Your heart is in the right place and I'm sure she would love a quilt.
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