fratcat

Many years ago my first husband and I had moved into a brand new luxury apartment in Atlanta. We were proud of our apartment and we had white furniture, a little unrealistic maybe, but it was just us adults and no chilren. My husband held an office in the local Jaycee chapter and had to have a meeting with the other men in our apartment one evening. One of the men brought his wife and she brought her children and throughout the evening I was reminding her that her children was messing my walls up and please not allow them to misbehave. One had been given chocolate to eat by the dumb mother and it melted on his hands and he wiped it on my walls. I was seeing red. After many attempts to get her to control the child, of which I was ignored, I decided to take matters in my own hand. I went into my kitchen, grabbed a bucket of water and some spic and span and right when she and husband were beginning to leave, I gave it to her and told her she had to clean up what her child had destroyed. She was a little shocked at my being so forward, but her husband apologized for what his child done to the walls, and he cleaned it up for us. Needless to say, they never returned to my house. In my house, I am the boss, and I expect my guests to also be courteous and careful. I will not be a doormat for my guests. If they mess it up, and ignore by request to have their children behave, they will clean it up.

weezie

Do you feel responsible for Trudy? Is she unable to summon the courage/backbone to speak up for herself? And if so, how is that your responsibility? According to what you wrote, it is apparent to me that there is no diplomatic way of dealing with Daphne; you cannot find it if it doesn't exist.

sewbizgirl

She needs to just tell her the dogs have to stay in the car when she visits. She will either quit bringing them or quit coming herself. I wouldn't worry about hurting her feelings, as she seems pretty thick skinned and only concerned about her own needs/wants, anyway.

sewbizgirl

Where I live, the police have better things to do!

Quilter2B

Tell Trudy to tell "your friend" she is buying a kennel; her dogs will be welcome but only if they stay in the kennel while they visit. We rented out a room to a very nice young lady who had too small dogs - we will told they'd be no trouble, they were house broke and all that. Well, they weren't. We went out and bought two kennels, and told our tenant the dogs could stay only on one condition. The dogs ruined the carpet and made the entire house stink. Don't feel bad that you expect your friend to honor your wishes and respect your home. If she was a true friend, your requests wouldn't bother her.

lalaland

I appreciate your friend wanting an easy and painless way out, don't we all, but it has been my experience that people like Daphne do not take subtle hints, you have to be brutally honest, as in "you are welcome, but your dogs are not, leave them at home".

madamekelly

I have a seizure service dog. I always ask if I can bring him, and when someone says no, or with restrictions, I listen. I also carry my own baggies, and USE them. That said, your friend with the little 'pooper', is NOT your friend! She is not worried about losing friends obviously, so she will not mind losing another one. In this day and age of flesh eating bacteria, who needs her! Geez, some people's children!

caldreamgal

I agree.. ... you shouldn't have to put up with that Poo.. no pun intended.. .
If your stuck.. limit her dogs to a certain are or perhaps a crate.. Your house your rules.. It's tough.. I usually don't have the moxie to speak up.. Good luck.

mayday

buy nappies and present them to her for the dogs when she arrives------OR-----tell her to bring a cage or use yours!!!!! this is NOT on.

jojosnana

I would tell her you are welcome at my house and I would love to have you BUT your dogs are not welcome. She can choose how important the friendship is.