Rude Guild Members/Need Help
05-04-2011, 07:06 AM
#81
Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Jefferson, MA
Posts: 137
Originally Posted by Lena1952
Over the past few years I have noticed a tendency toward rudeness during our meetings. Members talk during a speaker, during the general meeting and not quietly. Several times I have had difficulty hearing what is being said due to the person behind me holding a conversation. As the new Prez of this guild, I need help finding a way to politely handle this situation. Me, I am normally a fairly blunt no nonsense kind of gal but realize tack it needed for this, so please help me tame these beasties nicely.
05-04-2011, 07:07 AM
#82
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: New Brunswick Canada
Posts: 72
As a retired teacher this works the best. Stop talking and look directly at the those who are disturbing the meeting. When you have their attention ask if there is something they'd like to contribute and then remind people to ask questions after the talk. Speakers are usually freebies for a club. They should be treated with respect. Not everyone is a strong speaker so shouldn't be expected to talk over those rude enough to disturb a meeting. As a teacher I seldom raised my voice yet my class was always quiet and respectful of others. In contrast a teacher across the hall was always shouting and her children shouted along with her!
05-04-2011, 07:26 AM
#83
Super Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Littlefield, TX, USA
Posts: 1,077
Many times, the people chatting are doing so because they can't hear everything the speaker is saying...usually due to failing hearing that they are not even aware of. It may seem rude...but they may be trying to find out what was just said.
I have two hearing impared children...they used to do that all the time...they finally learned to just get up and walk to the front of the room, so they could hear.
I have two hearing impared children...they used to do that all the time...they finally learned to just get up and walk to the front of the room, so they could hear.
Originally Posted by BMP
All good suggestions, if I am having a hard time hearing whats being said and the person who is chatting is near me I have no problem turning and saying something to them...I am quite blunt when it comes to people like that....
05-04-2011, 07:33 AM
#84
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Springfield, Illinois
Posts: 142
Originally Posted by bearisgray
Originally Posted by DogHouseMom
Try these methods.
At the beginning of the meeting politely remind the members that the speaker will appreciate everyone's full attention and that during each topic covered there will be a period for questions and answers and that is the appropriate time for others to talk.
After covering a subject, remember to look up and around and ask for questions and comments. But then remember to keep the conversation on topic.
Sometimes all it takes is a glance in the direction of the talkers IF you can catch their eye. If not, don't be afraid to stop and say "excuse me Mary and Jane - is there something you need to add to the topic now?". It's a polite way to say "I heard you therefore it was disturbing" but at the same time give them an "out" if it was truely important to the topic.
Lastly, each speaker (if there is more than one) should speak loud enough to be heard by all. A strong voice is a good reminder to everyone else that someone else is indeed speaking at this moment. I personally have noticed a drastic reduction in "outside conversation" when a person with a strong speaking voice has the floor vs a person without. Call it "stage presence" or whatever ... it works.
It also helps if the speaker is standing unless talking to a group of less than 10.
At the beginning of the meeting politely remind the members that the speaker will appreciate everyone's full attention and that during each topic covered there will be a period for questions and answers and that is the appropriate time for others to talk.
After covering a subject, remember to look up and around and ask for questions and comments. But then remember to keep the conversation on topic.
Sometimes all it takes is a glance in the direction of the talkers IF you can catch their eye. If not, don't be afraid to stop and say "excuse me Mary and Jane - is there something you need to add to the topic now?". It's a polite way to say "I heard you therefore it was disturbing" but at the same time give them an "out" if it was truely important to the topic.
Lastly, each speaker (if there is more than one) should speak loud enough to be heard by all. A strong voice is a good reminder to everyone else that someone else is indeed speaking at this moment. I personally have noticed a drastic reduction in "outside conversation" when a person with a strong speaking voice has the floor vs a person without. Call it "stage presence" or whatever ... it works.
It also helps if the speaker is standing unless talking to a group of less than 10.
And very tactful - giving the detractors an "out" - at least once or twice - is a gracious thing to do.
05-04-2011, 07:51 AM
#85
Power Poster
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Front row
Posts: 14,646
I was president for two years. When we had chatter mouths going during the program there was one older member who shouted at the talkers, YOU TWO BE QUIET! She was my gavel. She was one of the founding members so she did mostly what she wanted and she was a stickler for manners and rules. If she could do it the other members followed her lead and have no hesitation to tell others to stop, be quiet, turn off your cell, etc.
05-04-2011, 07:55 AM
#86
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,152
As head of organizations during my former years. I faced the same problem. I just stood at the podium until everybody realized the meeting was not going forward and they quited down. There were times, (I timed the lapses) when I would have to wait 5 minutes. They soon learned that nothing was going to be done until they "shut up".
In addition to this, I play bingo 2 nights a week. People love to gab. When the caller is ready and they are still gabbing, I whistle. It become quiet very quickly.
In addition to this, I play bingo 2 nights a week. People love to gab. When the caller is ready and they are still gabbing, I whistle. It become quiet very quickly.
05-04-2011, 07:57 AM
#87
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: N Indiana
Posts: 518
This is the main reason my old guild went from 45 members to less than 20. People got tired of others talking and then asking the President to repeat what she had just said. Very frustrating. Now those 15 or so can just sit and talk, because no one would accept being an officer and the guild is dying. So sad.
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