"Just let me get my magic wand..."
05-08-2016, 08:55 AM
#81
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: New Brunswick, Canada
Posts: 471
There is only one answer that will put a stop to every request. It's simple and to the point. Say:
No, I don't want to. It works for every request, every time. If someone doesn't think twice about putting me on the spot I have fun saying No I don't want to. It's worth it to see the expression on their faces, You don't want to do something I wanted you to do for me???
No, I don't want to. It works for every request, every time. If someone doesn't think twice about putting me on the spot I have fun saying No I don't want to. It's worth it to see the expression on their faces, You don't want to do something I wanted you to do for me???
The trick is, just say "no"...don't justify (i.e. no, because.....) People will try to guilt you into doing it, as you've given them an "in" by offering a reason you're saying no. Just a plain NO ("I don't want to" is a nice addition!) you're not giving them something to work with. This applies to anything you're saying NO to.
05-08-2016, 09:02 AM
#82
Power Poster
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 10,722
People think because I have one or two sewing machines and possibly more
and a sewing room that I can sew or mend anything they have and for free. Just last week I was asked to repair a blouse and a former neighbor asked me to repair some items for her and now my dn asked me to hem her chiffon dress. No. I don't have a shingle out saying "Will do mending and repairs"! I sew quilts or whatever because I want to, I don't want to get this started. I wouldn't know where to start with chiffon. I give them the name of a local mending and repair store that does have there shingle out for business.
and a sewing room that I can sew or mend anything they have and for free. Just last week I was asked to repair a blouse and a former neighbor asked me to repair some items for her and now my dn asked me to hem her chiffon dress. No. I don't have a shingle out saying "Will do mending and repairs"! I sew quilts or whatever because I want to, I don't want to get this started. I wouldn't know where to start with chiffon. I give them the name of a local mending and repair store that does have there shingle out for business.
05-08-2016, 10:49 AM
#83
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 390
My friend had a neighbor ask her to sew together blocks she had embroidered, then hand quilt and finish the quilt. Her neighbor is a retired hair dresser, so they struck a deal--a finished quilt for doing her hair for the rest of her life. They are both near eighty and very happy with the deal.
05-08-2016, 11:30 AM
#84
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,369
No magic wand story request but I've just finished the top for a little I Spy quilt which I made to give to a lifelong friend's granddaughter, for her new baby. As I was planning the borders I suddenly came to and realized that while the grandmother -- my friend -- would appreciate it, the granddaughter, a very modern young woman, is probably not even a "quilt" person and I can well imagine her tossing it. I would probably never know -- my friend would certainly never tell me -- but I'm now so convinced that I've decided not to give it. I'm a little sad because I had planned to surprise my friend with it, but while I know we can't control what people do with our gifts, I've decided to give it elsewhere, to someone I know will like it.
No blame to the granddaughter; people are free to like what they like. But I forget sometimes, in my creative eagerness, that not everyone likes or values homemade gifts, including quilts.
No blame to the granddaughter; people are free to like what they like. But I forget sometimes, in my creative eagerness, that not everyone likes or values homemade gifts, including quilts.
05-08-2016, 12:09 PM
#85
Super Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Round Rock,Texas
Posts: 6,135
I gave a relative a wedding quilt. Its a queen size basket quilt, the backing is Mardi Gras fabric. Nobody ever sees the front of the quilt. 
Sharon in Texas
Sharon in Texas
Last edited by purplefiend; 05-08-2016 at 12:11 PM.
05-08-2016, 12:22 PM
#86
Super Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,139
There is only one answer that will put a stop to every request. It's simple and to the point. Say:
No, I don't want to. It works for every request, every time. If someone doesn't think twice about putting me on the spot I have fun saying No I don't want to. It's worth it to see the expression on their faces, You don't want to do something I wanted you to do for me???
No, I don't want to. It works for every request, every time. If someone doesn't think twice about putting me on the spot I have fun saying No I don't want to. It's worth it to see the expression on their faces, You don't want to do something I wanted you to do for me???
05-08-2016, 03:30 PM
#88
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: St. Louis suburbs
Posts: 6,084
My dear friend said she really wanted me to make her a queen size quilt. Before I could say no, she went on to tell me she would pick out the pattern and colors soon. She then added that she'd pay me $25 for the quilt. I had just made my first quilt which came about because I had taken a 6 week quilting class. And I had to buy my fabric at the store, the cost was over $200. I was able to interrupt my friend to tell her that I was way too new at this quilting to ever make her a quilt, the answer was a gentle, but firm no.
05-08-2016, 05:03 PM
#89
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Upstate NY, north of Syracuse Area
Posts: 6,003
No magic wand story request but I've just finished the top for a little I Spy quilt which I made to give to a lifelong friend's granddaughter, for her new baby. As I was planning the borders I suddenly came to and realized that while the grandmother -- my friend -- would appreciate it, the granddaughter, a very modern young woman, is probably not even a "quilt" person and I can well imagine her tossing it. I would probably never know -- my friend would certainly never tell me -- but I'm now so convinced that I've decided not to give it. I'm a little sad because I had planned to surprise my friend with it, but while I know we can't control what people do with our gifts, I've decided to give it elsewhere, to someone I know will like it.
No blame to the granddaughter; people are free to like what they like. But I forget sometimes, in my creative eagerness, that not everyone likes or values homemade gifts, including quilts.
No blame to the granddaughter; people are free to like what they like. But I forget sometimes, in my creative eagerness, that not everyone likes or values homemade gifts, including quilts.
05-08-2016, 05:14 PM
#90
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: North Dakota
Posts: 26
Here is my story. After living in a motor home with my 93 year old mother for 7 1/2 weeks following a flood in 2011, a man who was working in my basement at $40.00 an hour asked me to make his wife a quilt. I knew her as a friend and a fellow teacher. I told him I would if he paid for the supplies and paid me for my time. He agreed. I gave him in itemized estimate just like he had given me. I figured it would take about 12 yards of fabric at $12.00 a yard. I work at a local quilt shop and knew that was the going price. I added in the price for batting, thread and other supplies. I am a long arm quilter and have my own machine so I added the cost for quilting. I also added $40.00 per hour for my time. I figured if his time was worth $40.00 an hour, so was mine. When he was here for the end of the project, and presented me with the final bill, I gave him my estimate. It came to $1350.00. Needless to say, I haven't heard from him to make his wife a quilt.
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