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Thread: Idiot sightings

  1. #1
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    Idiot sightings

    These aren't new but perhaps you haven't read them before:

    I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00 ..
    I said "May I have large bills, please"?
    She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir; all the bills are the same size."
    When I got up off the floor I explained it to her....
    When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'
    This was at the Ford dealership in Canton,
    MS

    IDIOT SIGHTINGWe had to have the garage door repaired.
    The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
    I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
    He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
    He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'

    We haven't used Sears repair since.


    IDIOT SIGHTING
    My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.
    Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
    She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes Iknow, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back
    She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request.
    I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'
    The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

    Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.
    IDIOT SIGHTING
    I live in a semi rural area.
    We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office
    to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.
    The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!
    I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'


    IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICEMy daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
    She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
    He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

    From Kansas City


    IDIOT SIGHTINGI was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
    'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
    To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
    He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
    Happened in Birmingham, AL

    IDIOT SIGHTINGThe stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
    I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
    I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?'
    She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
    IDIOT SIGHTINGAt a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker, who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,'
    Our manager commented cheerfully,
    'This is fun. We should do this more often.'
    Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
    This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


    IDIOT SIGHTING
    I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself.
    And for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
    A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.






    STAY ALERT!

    They walk among us......and theyVOTE!

  2. #2
    Super Member Neesie's Avatar
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    Those are some good ones!
    Neesie


    By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out.
    ~Richard Dawkins

  3. #3
    Super Member Prism99's Avatar
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    Ha! I can top some of these!

    I worked as a computer programmer in a fairly large company. The company was prospering, so a new wing was added to house the entire order entry department. The huge move was orchestrated and timed minutely, to minimize disruption to the company. The day of the move everything was going as scheduled. I got a call from the order entry supervisor complaining that her computer wasn't working. I immediately travelled to the beautiful new area of the building, sat down at her desk, and mentioned that her computer didn't seem to be getting any power. I checked the cord, found it wasn't plugged in, and asked where the nearest electrical outlet was. That's when the supervisor asked "You mean it needs electricity?" And that's when I found that none of the cubicles for the order entry people in this new wing of the building were wired for electricity.

  4. #4
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    Those were hilarious. It reminds me of something that I remember from my childhood living in California. I was with my Dad at the bank. He was withdrawing money and he told the teller that we were going on a trip to Hawaii. The lady said, "Oh, how fun! Will you be driving?" We laughed about that for years and years.

  5. #5
    Super Member ptquilts's Avatar
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    I once watched a teller at a bank (and not a young one, either) use her calculator to figure out 80% of $100.

  6. #6
    Super Member crafty pat's Avatar
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    Thanks for the laughs, you cheered up my day.

  7. #7
    Super Member burchquilts's Avatar
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    "STAY ALERT!" The world needs more lerts! LOL!
    (`v)
    `*..*
    .
    .*).*)
    (.(. (..`..♥ rebecca

  8. #8
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    Funny!!
    But this is scary:

    STAY ALERT!

    They walk among us......and theyVOTE!

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by bstock View Post
    Funny!!
    But this is scary:

    STAY ALERT!

    They walk among us......and theyVOTE!
    And of course they won't be smart enough to vote the same way I do! LOL!!!!!

  10. #10
    Super Member catmcclure's Avatar
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    A couple of years ago I went into Best Buy to purchase a scanner so I could digitize the boxes and boxes of photographic slides I have accumulated over the years. I told the young clerk that I wanted a scanner so I could digitize my photo slides. He carefully explained to me that if I just wanted my photos on the computer there was a cord I could attach to my camera and transfer the photos to the computer. I have not been to Best Buy since.

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