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-   -   Men....funny!!!! (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/men-funny-t90996.html)

Ditter43 01-16-2011 08:02 AM

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweatshirt..
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' OHIO STATE ! '
And they say blondes are dumb.....
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A couple is lying in bed. The man says, 'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world....'
The woman replies, 'I'll miss you.......
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'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
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Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
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Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN
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Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy..
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Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
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Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end to wipe..
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Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the email folder 'Instruction Manuals'

sewwhat85 01-16-2011 08:08 AM

you are toooo funny :lol: :lol:

CarrieAnne 01-16-2011 08:51 AM

lol!

mygirl66 01-16-2011 09:03 AM

you crack me up!

Grinster 01-16-2011 09:27 AM

I can always count on you to make me laugh.....every day! Thanks so much for sharing!

pamkasperi 01-16-2011 09:29 AM

As I read this my husband was whistling...I was laughing so hard I couldn't tell him why I was laughing - then all three of my DD's came and read and started laughing...I don't think we will ever be able to hear him whistle without laughing our heads off now!

isewhappy 01-16-2011 11:40 AM

LOL. My husband's reply to these... "yeah, yeah, yeah."

Keep 'em coming.

Tink's Mom 01-16-2011 12:45 PM

LOVE the whistle joke...ROFL

co.durhamgirl 01-16-2011 12:52 PM

Brilliant. I needed a good laugh!

thequilterslink 01-16-2011 12:56 PM

My dh didn't care for any of them, dont' know why???


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