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Thread: Quite honestly a matter of tact...

  1. #41
    stay-at-home's Avatar
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    Jan 2008
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    when i first finish a quilt that's half way decent, I love it. I want to show it off. Give it a few days and then I see the mistakes. but I don't want anybody taking my pleasure away in those first few days. Soooo, maybe some of the criticism depends on how long ago the quilt was finished! As we get some distance from it, we can take the criticism better. And constructive criticism is a necessary thing.

  2. #42
    Senior Member
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    Dec 2006
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    TN originally now in MS
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    Yes, constructive criticism is a good thing given it that it is given in kindness. I know myself I don't want to send something to someone that I would not like to receive. I appreciated the kindness about my Red Hat Lap disaster of a quilting job. Thankfully my sister loved it anyway. I just hope that future quilts won't suffer the same condition. :lol:

  3. #43
    Super Member
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    Jul 2007
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    SE Wisconsin
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    I think most of the time we can tell when a person is looking for affirmation and when they want help with a problem. If you want to know why your triangles all ended up crooked, it's frustrating to be told "Oh, it's just beautiful as it is!" and "Don't worry about it!"

    And really, if someone has just finished 36 blocks, it's a little late to tell them that their background fabric doesn't have sufficient contrast to display the star points. It would just frustrate them.

    There is always SOMETHING nice to say!

  4. #44
    Steve's Avatar
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    Aug 2007
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    I guess that is why I like the constructive part sandwiched in the middle Cathe, so that I can improve the next time.

    "Looks warm!" HA!

  5. #45
    lisae's Avatar
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    Jan 2008
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    Santa Cruz, CA
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    Quote Originally Posted by k_jupiter
    Quote Originally Posted by Steve
    Honest Tim, pink really is in the rainbow (color spectrum) if you look hard enough. HA! Never met a color that I didn't love in one way or another.
    And green peas go on top of Shepard's Pie. Don't mean I don't pick each and every little green bugger out before I eat my dinner.

    PINK... BAH!

    tim in san jose
    Pink is okay, but I am glad to see someone else feels the same way I do about green peas...:)

  6. #46
    stay-at-home's Avatar
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    Jan 2008
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    is that a pic of your red hat lap quilt Deb?? i sure don't see any disaster there. i see a beautiful quilt! What's the disaster????

  7. #47
    quiltmaker101's Avatar
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    Mar 2007
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    Pensacola, FL
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    This is why our Guild Card says "Everyone's Welcome." Too many of us have been slighted or not accepted at our local quilt guilds.

    This is the place you can ask questions, share your troubles, show off your work, and even learn online.

    It is not the place for nasty comments or criticism.

    If I see something that is not my cup of tea, I try to post a some sort of honest compliment, or I just don't post anything. Usually someone else has already shared my sentiment anyway!

    I think a lot of us here think of this as our group of friends! Especially the chat girls!

  8. #48
    Tiffany's Avatar
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    It would seem most everyone here approaches this in about the same manner and I'm right along with the rest of you. The one thing I never, never do is tell someone I like their quilt when I simply do not. I do not have the type of personality to enjoy false praise and I feel I need to respect others enough not to give it. As many of you can guess, this relates to childhood issues. My family uses praise as a form of manipulation and so I am somewhat sensitive to the issue. I won't give out praise I don't feel, yet even if I dislike the quilt, there is always something positive I can find to say about it. And I find that if I don't like something, it is often easier to ask the quilter questions and learn the story behind the quilt (every quilt has one). Often that will allow me to appreciate it more than I would have otherwise and quite often I learn something, which is always an added bonus. And I never knock anyone for the pattern they chose or the colors they use because each is very subjective and I know my tastes won't always line up exactly with everyone else's. How boring if it did! :lol:
    ~Tiffany


  9. #49

    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    43
    Like the one with the cross that you have for your tag? see how'd that make you feel? BE NICE! ask them what they like most about it. if they like/love it they must value your opinion, do you really care if anyone likes your cross? You love it.

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