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  • I consider myself a quilter not a sewing fix-it-all!

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    Old 08-11-2011, 06:01 PM
      #41  
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    Oh, and I did give her back the blanket. I almost didn't do it but I didn't want to be mean and spiteful. When I gave it back to her is when she mentioned she has something else for me to fix. That is what prompted my rant and buying her a sewing kit.
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    Old 08-11-2011, 06:33 PM
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    I don't mind HOME repairs..as it saves me $$ in the long run..but YOU are being taken advantage of...hope you can learn to say NO soon...
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    Old 08-11-2011, 06:41 PM
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    Originally Posted by tabsmonsters
    I am in a pickle. This young wife whose husband works with mine found out that I sew and in the last several months has brought me sofa pillows that popped a seam, a stuffed animal that popped a seam and the other day my hubby brought home a blanket that she needed the binding sewn back on. When I returned it to her this morning, she mentioned another project she needs fixed. Its a simple project, sewing a bow back onto a costume but her excuse was she didn't have needle and thread. I am just beyond irritated that she seems to think that because I have a sewing machine and I know how to fix these things, she can bring me all sorts of projects. I was still fuming this afternoon and bought a cheap sewing kit to give to her the next time I see her and I plan on SHOWING her how to sew that bow on. It really isn't that difficult. I guess I have just been feeling used and I don't know how to tactfully deter her from using me as her personal seamstress or sewing fix-it-all. Thanks for letting me vent!
    I know your pain..my DH (Had) a friend who brought a pair of shorts over once..said your arts and crafty you can fix these while I'm here..I informed him..I was an artist and I never fixed anything for rude people.. who assume they could ask Picasso to paint their garage..lol..!!
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    Old 08-11-2011, 06:51 PM
      #44  
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    Originally Posted by tabsmonsters
    Originally Posted by Rose L
    Personally I'm a little put off by your comment that you don't want her as a friend. Being helpful doesn't mean you have to be chummy and go out for lunch and shopping after all. Besides do you really have more friends than you can stand? It's quite possible that this young woman never learned manners or how to survive from her own family, I say she just needs some guidance and I would give it to her while standing my ground.
    I know that sounded mean and I am sorry, but as I get older, I find I am selective with who I make friends with since I got put it sticky situations when I was younger. I have been helpful to her, but after 15 yrs of being married to a Marine I have learned to be independent. I know she is young and they haven't been married as long as I have, but its not my job to hold her hand for every little thing. She hasn't once asked me to show her how to mend things, just simply hands it to me to do.

    I couldn't even show myself online on facebook without her trying to chat with me and ask me to do this and do that. One time she wanted me to drive to her house in the afternoon (20 minutes away on a good day) and fix the strap on her highchair that the dog had chewed through before she needed it at dinner. That was the turning point for me and after that she was just a nuisance to me. My husband was deployed too, for much longer than hers was, and I have two kids to take care of while she only has one.

    I don't have the time, patience, or desire it would require to maintain her as a friend. I know how I must sound, but that's just how it is. I won't outright be mean to her or anything like that or I would have done it already. I don't have a lot of friends, but I like it that way. They don't bug me to death with helping them with every little thing.

    I have been rambling long enough I think, lol! I really do appreciate all the replies. I will try to have more patience with her and show her how to mend a few things.
    Good Reply Tabsmonsters.......
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    Old 08-11-2011, 06:56 PM
      #45  
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    If you really can't say "NO to them at least charge them!!
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    Old 08-11-2011, 07:17 PM
      #46  
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    Personally I think it is ok for you to not want to be friends with her. Not everyone wants or needs alot of friends. Life is short so each of us has to decide what people are the most important to us and invest our time and love in those people. Besides it seems she doesn't really want to be a friend as much as she wants someone to fix things for her. That is not friendship it is a one way relationship. (Aka - a one way street.)
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    Old 08-11-2011, 09:17 PM
      #47  
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    A friend of my Dh asked me to hem his shorts, I'll need you to put them on so I can mark where you want them hemmed. You would of thought I asked him to dance naked in front of me. He says " hey whoa ho ho! cant you just hem them?" So I thought he doesnt want me that close to "Him". I Hemmed the shorts, gave them back and he says they are still to long. Furious I was. I rehemmed them and they were fine. Never again will he do this to me. Either you let me mark them or I dont sew. I'm not crazy about sewing denim anyway. I broke 3 needles because I didnt have the correct needle for sewing denim because I dont like to sew denim! Another gal keeps bringing me her old purses to mend. I make purses, I dont want to mend them and I told her that but she insisted I take them. I mended the first ones she brought but this time I've had them now for 4 months. When she asks about them I'll tell her the same, I make purses I dont mend them.
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    Old 08-11-2011, 09:23 PM
      #48  
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    Originally Posted by tabsmonsters
    Originally Posted by LindaM
    Showing her how to sew may be a wonderful opportunity to establish a friendship.

    You also could gently suggest that you can't do her projects - that cuts into your valuable 'quilt therapy' time :)
    The problem is I really have no desire to be her friend. We really have nothing in common besides the fact we are both married to Marines. I just don't want to hurt her feelings or cause stress for my husband at work.

    Thank you for all the replies!
    OH Wonderful Military Politics, you can't win, that's why I'm happy my hubby is no longer in the Marine Corps, don't have to deal with people I don't care for... Next time however, I would say I'm sorry have quilts that need my attention and just don't have time right now....
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    Old 08-12-2011, 03:15 AM
      #49  
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    I would say I'm sorry have quilts that need my attention and just don't have time right now....[/quote]

    i agree!
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    Old 08-12-2011, 03:19 AM
      #50  
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    Originally Posted by tabsmonsters
    I am in a pickle. This young wife whose husband works with mine found out that I sew and in the last several months has brought me sofa pillows that popped a seam, a stuffed animal that popped a seam and the other day my hubby brought home a blanket that she needed the binding sewn back on. When I returned it to her this morning, she mentioned another project she needs fixed. Its a simple project, sewing a bow back onto a costume but her excuse was she didn't have needle and thread. I am just beyond irritated that she seems to think that because I have a sewing machine and I know how to fix these things, she can bring me all sorts of projects. I was still fuming this afternoon and bought a cheap sewing kit to give to her the next time I see her and I plan on SHOWING her how to sew that bow on. It really isn't that difficult. I guess I have just been feeling used and I don't know how to tactfully deter her from using me as her personal seamstress or sewing fix-it-all. Thanks for letting me vent!
    I SURE KNOW HOW YOU FEEL MY REAL NAME IS ARLENE,EVERY ONE AROUND CALLS ME WEENWEEN,AND I GET WEENWEEN CAN YOU FIX THIS.I EVEN GAVE MY NIECE A SINGER 257 ACOUPLE YEARS BACK AND SHE STILL I'LL TAKE IT TO WEEN WEEN SHE CAN FIX ANYTHING.I AM THANKFULL GOD HAS BLESSED ME TO BE ABLE TO SEW.I AM SURE HE BLESSED SOME MORE AROUND HERE THEY JUST DON'T USE THEIR TALENT.
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