On a child's Superman costume-- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
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This actually does happen. Once my youngest as a child pinned a towel around her neck, climbed onto the table and yelled that she was Superman (didn't have such a good grasp of DNA at that age) and leaped from the table to the floor. The flight was successful, but the landing left a lot to be desired, since she hit the chair on the way down, and had a black eye by the time we got to ER. I almost got pulled in by CPS, but she was always talkative and was thoroughly ticked off because she couldn't fly like Superman on TV and told the ER doctor in great detail about it. ALL about it, over and over, she was really mad at Superman and not her own stupidity. (Now she's a 50 year old school teacher and highly intelligent!!!)
I had gone to answer the phone and thought she was busy trying to pin the towel around the dog's neck for a bandanna.
And then there was the time other daughter put a bean in her ear....well, perhaps some of these labels ARE really necessary!!!!