This is one of those areas of quilting that just make you want to scream. Don't be so hard on yourself, know that there are many 'seasoned' quilters and those that consider themselves experts that use a seam ripper more often than they'll usually admit.
I am the first to say I 'rippit' a lot some days. There are classes fmq, hand quilting, and lots of things but it all comes down to practice. What looks imperfect to you will look beautiful to someone else.
Enjoy it, relax, shake your shoulders frequently, and most of all go slower than normal. You'll get it. We expect ourselves to be able to do everything perfectly the first time we try and it's just not feasible. Learn to live with upside down/wavy lines........you'll truly enjoy your quilting more!
Hugs