Originally Posted by clem55
It's questions like this that make me glad I am not raising a teen now. But, that same situation came up with my GD wehile in highschool, and believe it or not, her dad( very strict) allowed her to stay........ He checked with several other parents, also with the host parents and felt it would be okay. Those parents had two levels in their home, girls would sleep upstairs where mom was, and boys downstairs where dad was( his position was at the bottom of the stairs). The hostsd were the parents of a daughter( think that is a plus). Anyway, they had lots of snacks, games, videos etc, and the kids had a ball, and no one got hurt. According to GD, by 2:00 AM, they were all getting tired and drifted off to bed anyway, and not as couples. This seems to be a very popular thing to dfo these days, mainly because the parents are wanting the kids to be home after these dances and not out drinking or having sex in a motel, and that also seems to be "The Plan" for after these dances, and has been for a long time. When I talked to GD about it, she said "really grandma, do you think I'd want to be having sex with everyone around and no privacy"? Do I approve of these things, no, but I also know that I never stayed at a co-ed sleepover, nver had a sleepover with my BF, had strict parents, was taught all the morals, knew right from wrong, and I still managed to get pregnant at 16. If kids want to have sex, they will find a time and place no matter what.So mommas' , if you want to protect your daughters, and sons!! make sure they are protected with the proper birth control and knowledge. Then PRAY, a LOT!! My daughter works in a highschool, and the stories she tells me about these girls and todays attitude about sex is enough to make you sick.
I go along with the above poster. In this day & time, if your kids want ot have sex, it can be done during School hrs. Drugs, alcohol as well during School hrs. The fact that your DD came & told you about the plans, to me shows that it is on the up & up. If it wasn't, she would have left out the part of the boys staying over. You cannot protect & shelter your kids 24/7. By the age 16 they should have good solid foundations from their raising so they can make good decisions. I raised 4 kids of my own and 2 of a family member. Not 1 got pregnant before marriage, no drinking, no drugs, no law breaking. I was very lucky. But I also was very open with them so they would come to me about everything.
I have a 19 yr old DGS & he has a great group of friends. Rather than socialize with party groups or sex parties like some, he preferred to have mixed couples over to my DD's home for parties or holidays, like New Years Eve. My DD, her DH & I as well as any parents that wanted to chaperoned or dropped in at any given hr. They stayed right in the middle of all of the kids. They had movies, video games, board games, card games, food out the wazzoo & the kdis were safe & off of the streets. She had ea kid lock their vehicle & bring her the keys. They got them back soon as they had breakfast & called their folks to say they were leaving. She set the alarm on her home so it would go off if the doors were opened. It was & is very tiring for the parents to have something like this in their home, but....they know what the kids are doing & it is safe. Go talk to these parents by all means. Ask if they are comfortable with you dropping by at any givent time you feel the need. Main thing is to keep up the communication and repoire you have with your child. If you choose to not let her attend, she may not tell you about the mixed company mext time. Good Luck & we are here for you regardless of what decision you make on this Mom. :wink: