I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband 5 years ago at the age of 61. What keeps me going is this: I know he is happy in heaven and I could not wish him back to this crazy, crazy world. He is too good for all this selfish, uncaring world that we are living in today.
So I suggest you be happy for him where he knows the peace and happiness promised to us, and you do the best you can to serve our Lord. May God bless and keep you.