Tailor's wax was most commonly used in dressmaking. I am told it can be removed with steam. Havn't tried it.
Pencils... Lots of different pencils for marking fabric/quilts. there are a number on the market that indicate they are washable. Always test before using. There is a new mechanical pencil (Sewline, Fons and Porter, Collins, etc) that are supposed to be washable. This means there is no wax in the led. If marking with a regular #2 pencil, keep the led sharp and mark just enough to see.
Pounce. This is a chalk substance that is used with stencils. There are two kinds: regular which is just chalk and will rub off if rubbed and lots of dust in the air.The second is similar to the tailors wax. It is a mixture which also is used with stencils but can be removed with steam. Both are put in an eraser type pad and either:
Pounce (first kind) which is patted. The second has to be rugged across the stencil like erasing a blackboard.
Chalk: Regular chalk will rub off easily so if machine quilting have to be really careful. Another is "Multi-Pastel Chalk) which is an artist pencil. It contains chalk and clay and is easy to remove with eraser and then wash out.I use this one only in white, light grey and dark grey. Stays on while machine quilting. However, I find that any chalk needs to be marked during the quilting. If the entire quilt is first marked then it will rub off while quilting.
About hand quilting. Start by practicing on 1/6" gingham check. This helps to keep the line straight and the squares to help in giving uniform stitches.
Don't try for tiny stitches at first but even stitches. Tiny will come with practice.