Originally Posted by QuiltnCowgirl
Originally Posted by Janet Espeleta
First of all I would definitely not lie to her about why I don't want to give her a copy. When you are doing the right thing there should be no reason to feel you have to lie about it.
I agree 100,000,000 times over. Why are we, the honest ones, feeling like we have to hem haw around, beat around the bush, & tell white lies? Old fashioned honesty is getting lost in our society, when what we should be able to do is openly hold people accountable.
Stand up for what you believe in. Tell the friend 'No' with a blunt, to the point, explanation. If this "friend" doesn't like it, that is her problem. You will feel better at the end of the day knowing you did what was right & upstanding.
The problem is that when we state what our values are - we frequently come across as saying they are LACKING in values. That may be or not - sometimes it's just different values - but unless we explain what we are basing our (values) decision on then we haven't created common ground for dialogue. And sadly, in this day and age, I am too stressed, too busy and too tired to explain why I do what I do. So I shorthand it - and some times end up hurting feelings. The "don't buy what you can borrow" philosophy is being touted everywhere as smart and frugal - and it has created a lot of rudeness and some hard feelings when I say 'No."