seasaw2mch, I'm sorry to hear that you're refusing treatment, as cancer treatment, however unpleasant it may be, drastically increases your chances of leading a long and healthy life, and indeed many of us on this board owe our lives to doctors, but I'm sure you know that already and don't need some stranger on the internet telling you that.
I will say that my mother has done a lot of work with cancer charities, and the money absolutely is going to help people with cancer. It isn't funnelled straight to cancer patients, it goes on things like research, medical care, support services and so forth. My mother personally managed a legacy that she made sure was used to increase lymphoedema treatment, as when she had cancer twenty years ago they basically just treated the cancer, knew nothing about lymphoedema, and often left patients in quite a bad way. She's had more brushes with death than I can count by now because of the lymphoedema, though she's still very thankful that the cancer treatment saved her life. She also received some incredible services from local cancer charities.
Of course, not all of the money goes to this, some of it has to go to the people working for the charity. My partner works with a major charity and let me assure you, they are by no means wasting too much money on paying their staff. If anything, it's the other way around and sometimes verges on slave labour!
And I know it's hard when you're ill and broke and people ask you to give money to charity, but they're not actually trying to squeeze money out of people who are ill and impoverished, they're making general appeals. Charities make most of their money from very wealthy people, as far as I'm aware, whether it's by donation or legacy.