I am lactose intolerant, which is a bit easier. But in recipes that call for milk you can use rice milk, coconut milk, oat milk or soy. Cheese is a little more difficult, but I have tracked down a parmesan substitute, over here in the UK. We are always far behind you in these matters. Do you have Free From aisles in the supermarkets? I find lots of things there that I can use instead.