My mother stopped speaking when I was very young. She lived another 20 years after that with little communication coming out of her. I knew that she sewed and crocheted, but didn't fathom the extent of her talent until she was gone. I didn't even know she went to college for fashion design or anything.
She was still alive as a newbie quilter, but didn't really see any of my work. I made her a no sew fleece throw so the nursing home to boil it to their hearts content. I didn't want to see a quilt I made ruined, or stolen, by them.
She died the day after Christmas 2007. I was very close to my dmil, and she passed away that same year, suddenly, in July. She was the one who got the quilt bug to bite me.
I hear Judy, my dmil, all the time. What she would say about my kids, I think of her when I'm quilting. On Mother's Day and my mother's birthday in February, I always do something that I think mom would like if we did together or some little trinket for her. This year, I made a few lacy coasters on her birthday, and for Mother's Day, I made a home-made pin cushion. Just trying to keep some kind of connection to the woman I didn't really know very well. I was 27 when she died, but she'd been sick for 29 years. Neither my younger brother nor myself, knew what she was like when she was healthy.