I'll meet any online quilter I have been emailing or chatting with. I have no fear of one being a loon or crazy. We always meet first in a public place. I have sense enough to say I don't feel comfortable with you so I'm leaving. I've only had to do that once. She brought her DH who was loud, obnoxious, and too flirty for me to tolerate.
I have met many other online pals and they have all been super! It never occurred to me to take my DH with me to meet another quilter. He would be bored to death especially if we decided to go to the quilt shop after meeting.