When my sister first became a single parent, my DH and I made her family our Christmas Angel family. After 3 years of major gift giving and no responses from them - they were all over 10 years old and my sister was included in the thank you neglect - we stopped doing it.
Not a word was *ever* mentioned about their receiving these gifts OR our eventually stopping giving them.
These kids are now in their 30s with children of their own. Their mom died 18 months ago of cancer and I promised her I'd stand in as her representative with them for as long as they needed me. I still do not do gifts, they have much more income than I do, but have given small thoughtful gifts to their children for their young birthdays. That will also stop in a few years as they grow older and I grow "poorer". Nobody seems to be offended by any of this. We all get together for Thanksgiving, birthdays and Christmas meals, traveling several hours to do so. It's enough. Christmas should be about love, family, fellowship, celebration......not gifts.
Only my mother, daughters and their spouse, and grandson receive gifts from me. Friends receive my love, a card, a holiday lunch together, a service or trade, a homemade food gift, or a small plant.
Jan in VA