You definitely are not a meanie. In my opinion it is rude to ask someone to make something without offering to pay the materials - at least, and actually it is fair to offer something for the work as well. In addition to quilting, I do photography and every once in a while there are people asking if I could take pictures of their family/kids/cats/dogs - you name it. And it is all with an assumption that since I have the professional cameras and all the gear, I am always available to take pictures free for "friends".
I politely decline, saying that I have other projects in the works, don't have time... typically referring to the fact that doing professional pictures for someone free is time away from the paid assignments.
And I do the same with quilting although I do very few quilts for sale, or based on orders.