Make yourself one!
I've put so much into raising Dusty as well, yet I fear that the damage his father did is too overwhelming. He constantly taught him through his words that nothing was ever good enough, so he figures why try? Of course, he transfers that to me as well, even though I tell him to just do his best and give 100% and we'll work with whatever happens. He barely graduated high school, and he's on his 2nd academic suspension from college. He's been looking for a job since Christmas, but I wonder if he's "looking" or looking some days, especially since he hasn't had the first interview. He blames us for not letting him work when he was in high school, but I told him then that if he couldn't do his school job, then how was he going to do his school job and his paying job? The school job came first, and if he got his grades up I'd let him get a job, but he never kept them up for more than a few weeks at a time. I honestly don't know what to do with him anymore. If I send him to live with his father and his parents (yes, my ex lives at home again, long story) then I feel like I'm saying that life is OK. There's not an ounce of ambition or hunger to better themselves between the lot of them. In fact, they've all steadily gotten worse the last 10 years or so.
Dusty is well behaved and very respectful, but has no motivation or drive. I just don't know what to do to help him anymore. Even the therapist, who he really liked, couldn't reach him at all.