I have a couple of questions; 1) do you make quilts for others, 2) If you do, do you charge for them, 3) If you do, does she know that you do quilts for others. If your answers are "yes" then perhaps that will influence how you respond. Sometimes I will have to admit to family or friend that I am just not comfortable doing something. It is the truth and they will normally accept that response. Good luck. I know how difficult these types of situations can be. I agree with Jan in VA, to try and keep your response sweet and sincere. Hopefully, we have helped you through this situation. Yolanda