I am so sorry that you are going through such a stressful time. Hang in there...it will get better. I've been there already. 7 yrs ago...DH was 49 and had a massive heart attack. He felt bad and said take me to the hospital. I told him that I was going to call the ambulance and DH said that if I did, he wouldn't go. I put him in the pickup and drove 35 miles in about 25 min. Whew...at least the deer weren't on the roads and no cops. At the hospital, they said he wasn't having a heart attack but had to keep him overnight anyway. He wasn't in the heart ward 10 min, and coded. They had to shock him 3 times to bring him back and rushed him to the cath lab. After about 2 hours of not knowing anything, he had 2 stents put in his heart and 24 hrs in ICU lying flat without moving at all. I sort of had to laugh at the nurse who thought that I was in the way...she said that she had something to MAKE him lay still and not move and that I should go home. I went to the pickup and took a one hour nap. When I got back to ICU, that same nurse was yelling at me wanting to know where I was at that she couldn't control DH. I just looked at her and said Aren't you glad that I didn't go home...35 miles??? She never even bothered to say I'm sorry. DH is fine now, with lots of meds tho. He was to quit smoking ...he hasn't. No caffeine....he still does. I still cook healthy, but can't control how he eats away from home...so I just pray for him.
Sending lot's of prayers and big cyber hugs to you and yours. (I quit smoking too and it is hard but it will pass.) You can do this for each other, just think of all the things you both have yet to experience together. :D Hugs and Prayers and hang in there. :D Tigger :D