Julie1, so sorry you are having a bad time. First take a deep breath. Give yourself a big hug and know that you are not the only person who has had a bad time with a Bonnie Hunter project. Trust me, there are plenty of BHUFO (bonnie hunter unfinished objects) out there, mystery and otherwise. Heck, there are all sorts of projects gone bad out there from all sources. You don't have to finish this, or at least not right now. It is not a race, but it is a lot of concentrated sewing. You can just walk away from this project entirely, you are more important than a handful of fabric.
If you choose to go on, Clue 2 was hard for many of us, and the triangle in a square comes back again as Clue 6. You said for that step you cut the side wings from the wrong fabric, is there any way the fabric you cut can still work? I'm thinking 6 will be part of the border treatment so it might be fine with the "wrong" side wings -- we will probably know more on Friday.
For me and your Clue 3, sometimes I'd rather just trash a bunch of non-usable pieces than take them apart and redo. You can use the new pieces to add more fabrics to your mix and hopefully making sure you have enough fabric. I think you were using one fabric for each set?? I'd have to go back through the thread, but there's nothing wrong in having 2 or more similar (or different!) fabrics instead. I have certainly done the redos before but now I use my declining vision as an excuse to buy new fabric and start over. But back in the day when I was doing a Storm at Sea I sewed all my first skinny triangles to the big diamond the wrong way. Carefully picked out all the stitches and sewed them the wrong way a second time! Yikes!!! must be more than 20 years later and I still remember. There are reasons on why I want to do the same step the same way for all my units, but now I typically make a few test units before committing to the whole batch.
Maybe you can salvage enough of your existing units and fabric to make a smaller sized project like Sandra-P?? Or even smaller???
Do what is right for you. We will be here to support you however you decide to go.