LOL That is so funny, meany pants. I have never seen them up here anywhere, but I don't think Buddy would let me put them on him anyway. I bought a little birdy leash when I first got him so I could take him outside with me and he fought so hard when I tried to put it on him, that I returned it. Forget it. I just bought him an outside cage instead. I know what you mean poopy shoulders and holes in shirts, and pant legs when you are not paying attention to him...just like a spoiled little kid, but lots of fun anyway.