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Thread: Cat Question?

  1. #1
    Super Member craftiladi's Avatar
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    I adopted a little female kitty last yr. She had kittens, I kept one and got them both fixed on the same day. Now mama kitty wants nothing to do w/ her son. Before getting fixed they were best of buds. I feel so bad as the baby just doesn't understand why his mama no longer wants to play.
    Any suggestions or tips would be apprecaited.

  2. #2
    Super Member sewjoyce's Avatar
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    How long has it been since surgery? If it was really recent, momma cat may not feel up to playing yet....just give her some time. :D

  3. #3
    Super Member oatw13's Avatar
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    You may not be able to do much. In my experience, some cats have a complete personality transformation after being fixed and also after having kittens. With the cats I have had, once that happened, they never returned to their "old" selves.

    Good luck!

  4. #4
    Super Member SherriB's Avatar
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    If it has been recent, it might be the smell from the anesthsia or surgery that is putting her off. My kitties have done that to each other when they had their surgeries. Some kitties are very sensitive to new smells.

  5. #5
    Super Member Jan in VA's Avatar
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    It's possible that the male is maturing and the naturual order will be to have the female step back a bit. I'm betting she'll come around once he gets thru his "teenage" years :-D

    We had a death of the youngest female barn cat this summer, she was pregnant. The other three - 2 males (one, her sire) and the female mother - were obviously affected by the status quo change, and for nearly 3 weeks were generally ignoring of each other. It was so obvious they were grieving, as we all were. Then slowly things got back to normal and they all ate from the same dish each night, palled around together, took naps near each other. Now the season has changed and the non-sire male is on the outs with the other two who are more dominant at feeding time. I'm betting it'll pass.

    Jan in VA

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by craftiladi
    I adopted a little female kitty last yr. She had kittens, I kept one and got them both fixed on the same day. Now mama kitty wants nothing to do w/ her son. Before getting fixed they were best of buds. I feel so bad as the baby just doesn't understand why his mama no longer wants to play.
    Any suggestions or tips would be apprecaited.
    With her hormone levels dropped because of the spay, she no longer feels it necessary to bond with the male. He may be her son, but they would not have hesitated to mate. It's a reproductive thing--survival of the species. They will be friends again but probably in a different capacity. Thanks for having them spayed and neutered!

  7. #7
    Power Poster sandpat's Avatar
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    You did the right thing in getting them spayed and neutered..thanks. Things will get back to what will be the new "normal" soon. Cats are very sensitive to smell and change of any kind. They just need time. They'll be fine. Just give them both lots of love during their recoveries.

  8. #8
    Super Member butterflywing's Avatar
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    try this:

    put a little cologne on yourself and let her smell it on you for two days or so. then put some on him where can't lick it, behind his neck. she might associate him with you and accept him. if it doesn't work right away keep trying for a while. if it doesn't work after 10 - 12 days, she just doesn't may not like him anymore.

  9. #9
    Tracy50's Avatar
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    Cats are very interesting and diverse as people. Their personalities change quite often throughout their whole lives. I've always had at least one if not more cats and their personalits do change when they get spayed/neutered(thank you), but give them a couple/few weeks to months and they will probably come up with a new relationship. since she was spayed, she's not a moma anymore and he's not a son anymore it's as if they're meeting for the first time (almost). I guess I'm saying the same thing as the others; therefore, I'll do ya'll a favor and shutup!...LOL! Like people, give them time and u will be rewarded.
    Tracy50

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by SherriB
    If it has been recent, it might be the smell from the anesthsia or surgery that is putting her off. My kitties have done that to each other when they had their surgeries. Some kitties are very sensitive to new smells.
    ditto. mine did that after surgeries.

  11. #11
    Super Member craftiladi's Avatar
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    Thank-you everyone for all the responses. Yes the whole scent thing dawned on me but because I really dislike that smell they get when at the vets they both got baths shortly after getting home that afternoon. Its been almost a mth & a half since the D day. And her attitude is getting worse, she growls if he gets within 10 ft of her.So far thats all that has happened as he doesn't insist on trying to get any closer. Its just sad, as he really doesn't understand.
    I am a huge believer in fixing my pets, the only reason this one hadn't gotton fixed we were unsure of her age and she didn't show any signs of being in heat-then all of a sudden her lil belly was huge.
    I have had enough cats all my life so I know first hand their attitudes do change...sometimes daily..lol
    I will just wait and see what happens-again a huge thanks!!!!

  12. #12
    Member KGrace's Avatar
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    It took my female over 6 months after her and baby boy were fixed to be even near the young male again. Then they became mousing pals, run thru the house together, share window sills, etc. Give them time and keep giving each their attention!

  13. #13
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    Have you considered taking her back to the vet to make sure she is doing well. My niece had her cat spayed and she seemed to be fine for a few weeks, and then unexpectedly passed on from an infection that they weren't even aware of she had. her personality had changed somewhat but everyone thought it was from her surgery healing. I do hope that they become friends again. I have 7 cats and not all of them were overly friendly after their surgeries. I would have her checked at the vet.

  14. #14
    Junior Member Angelmerritt's Avatar
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    As many have responded, this is not unusual. But I can recommend something to help with her behavior towards him (and others). Look into Pheremones for cats. Products like Feliway and others are pricey BUT you don't have to see a vet for a RX or try to shove pills down their throat, so I think of them as VERY AFFORDABLE. These pheremones are synthetically made to mimic those that cats rub on you when they push their cheeks/face on you (or their surroundings). It helps the cats feel safe, wanted, and friendly. My understanding is that they now come in colars, sprays, and diffusers. PM me for more details.

  15. #15
    Super Member craftiladi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angelmerritt
    As many have responded, this is not unusual. But I can recommend something to help with her behavior towards him (and others). Look into Pheremones for cats. Products like Feliway and others are pricey BUT you don't have to see a vet for a RX or try to shove pills down their throat, so I think of them as VERY AFFORDABLE. These pheremones are synthetically made to mimic those that cats rub on you when they push their cheeks/face on you (or their surroundings). It helps the cats feel safe, wanted, and friendly. My understanding is that they now come in colars, sprays, and diffusers. PM me for more details.
    Oh this sounds interesting I hadn't heard of a product like what you wrote about. Great suggestions everyone, thanks.

  16. #16
    Power Poster nativetexan's Avatar
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    well i have 3 cats. ,mamma and two kittens, girls. mamma got pregnant again before we got her completely inside and she ignored her two girls due to that. the girls became best buds and were "joined at the hip" for awhile. then mamma had six more kittens. after they were weaned and she lost interest, the girls "unjoined" themselves. i found homes for 3 of the second litter and gave 3 to a place that found homes for them.
    now mamma and her two girls chase each other, wash each other, hiss at each other, slap at each other, etc.
    they are just 3 cats living in the same house. not mamma and dtrs.
    you two are just 2 cats living in the same house. scold your mamma or son when either one is mean to the other. they should learn by the tone of your voice what is excepted or not.
    good luck.
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