Chester the bunny

We don't exchange gifts anymore. My poor mother who could not really afford it had been sending all the kids (grown up and all working) a check at Christmas and our Birthdays. It took a while for her to figure out that none of us were cashing the checks so she stopped.
I exchange with a few friends and we have rules. One of them only wants things that come from the thrift store/garage sale that way no one feels bad if it isn't kept and it's really a lot of fun shopping.
The other friend has a "user-upper rule" If you can't use it up, don't buy it. (Which leaves us with food (chocolate, spices, teas, ect...), soaps, fabric, paper napkins ....)

sewellie

We do not buy gifts anymore except for one grandchild, 1 gift. Our theory is to be together, not spending money, is what Christmas is about. Jesus is the reason for the season. Christmas is so commercialized that it's forgotten what the word Christmas means.

misseva

I hate shopping for any reason. After my two children were out of elementary school, I started giving them money for birthdays and Christmas. I have 9 people all told to buy for including daughter in law & son in law and 4 grands (1 is married). No stress at all. I also prefer cash for gifts. Sometimes I save up and buy a rather large gift, sometimes I buy underwear or something for my sewing/craft hobbies. The fun in getting money is deciding on what to buy - I'm like a kid in a candy store.

IrishgalfromNJ

I have one grown daughter and no grandchildren. My daughter has a good job and can buy herself anything she wants. I decided several years ago that I would not buy her Christmas presents anymore. We make a date to go out for a nice meal, maybe a movie or stay in and cook and spend quality time together. We still celebrate birthdays with gifts and meals, but that is much easier to do because we don't have that crush of shoppers for our birthdays. My brothers and I do not exchange Christmas gifts or birthday gifts. Cards only.

EmbQuilt

I totally agree

susanlh

I hate shopping so I am one to order on line. However for the adult kids (2 kids and spouses) we give tickets to a concert or event they want to attend. DH and I will finish off that gift with 1 overnite kid watch during the event. Everyone is happy with that.

cashs_mom

I have to agree with Neesie. You are doing all the work and going to all the expense by yourself. Why does that get to be a group vote? After doing Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner every year for my inlaws (or outlaws depending on how you look at it lol) for several years while working full time, I just said "No more". They are retired, comfortably well off and don't so much as invite us over to their house. The only time they invite their only surviving son (my husband) over is when they want him to do some work for them like moving the refrigerator. I just decided that this was way to one sided for me and was making me resentful so why continue. My husband would rather I did but since I'm the one doing all the work, he doesn't get a vote either lol

bearisgray

Seems like "the holidays" are stressful for many people.

Sometimes after one person puts a stop to the "stressful giving" part of it - even though the rest of the group might complain about it at first - most of the people are relieved.

dotcomdtcm

I have 3 adult children and one SIL. We will draw names and I will fill their stockings. I made napkin sets and microwave bowl holders for friends near and far, and one Chanukah table runner. I satisfy myself with a lot of charity sewing,
for children in shelters and hospitals. I miss shopping year-around when the kids were little, with the magic of Christmas morning filled with gifts from Santa. I used to bake a million cookies but then I used to eat 1/2 of them!!

amelia0607

I would love that but unfortunately my kids stay so busy that they don't want to get together. When they have down time, they want to stay home. I understand that but I do miss doing things together