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Family grading system - - -

Family grading system - - -

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Old 08-19-2016, 09:58 AM
  #1  
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Default Family grading system - - -

In the family I grew up in - there was a grading system -

From lowest to highest -

I think you can do better, dear - not well done
I guess that will do -
You are getting better at that -
Looking good -
That's very good!
Excellent!

No one got "perfect"

Your households?
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Old 08-19-2016, 10:01 AM
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Ha! I was the third of three. They were happy that I didn't fail anything! Words of affirmation/encouragement weren't really a thing in my home growing up. Parents divorced when I was 14. I guess they had bigger fish to fry than that...
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Old 08-19-2016, 10:10 AM
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My brothers and I could never please our father. Nothing was ever good enough. Once my younger brother brought home all As on his report card. It made my father mad - said "he got those As to spite me!"
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Old 08-19-2016, 11:37 AM
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No grading in my family even tho my mother taught 5th grade.
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Old 08-19-2016, 12:03 PM
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Wow - my step-dad had his quirks - but he was basically a decent man.
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Old 08-19-2016, 03:32 PM
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My parents encouraged my best, but no grading. My father was thrilled when I became the first in his family to graduate from college.
I'm thankful my sister and I did not endure abuse. My dad was a very patient and loving man, although he showed it more than said it.
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Old 08-19-2016, 03:44 PM
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.No grading system in our house. My parents said I was too hard on myself, they were not going to add pressure. (I thought they didn't notice me. ) My sister had learning disabilities , so no pressure on her. Now my brother was yelled at constantly, and was always a "disappointment" to my parents
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Old 08-19-2016, 04:08 PM
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this was not meant to make anyone sad. . Because my fsmily was Scandinavian-German-Lutheran living in Minnesota - a "pretty good" was fairly high praise.

They did not go out of their way to put us down, but we had to do more than show up to earn praise.

I was just wondering if other families had subtle ways of letting one know how one did .

My stepdad slways wanted me to do better than another girl in my class. not quite sure why that should have mattered - we were talented in different ways.
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Old 08-19-2016, 04:17 PM
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No actual grading in our house either, and not a happy home. I was the oldest of 6 and expected to help with the other kids and taking care of the house and I tried to blend into the woodwork. My dad was in the military, a tyrant, an alcoholic. And my mother was a doormat trying to please my dad or sick in bed with a headache. They acted, for the most part, that they didn't even like us. It's amazing that most of us turned out ok.
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Old 08-19-2016, 05:01 PM
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I was raised by "June & Ward"! Seriously, while my Mom would say "don't do a job half-assed" it was about my chores, not anything I created or school work. My Dad just said "you can do anything you set your mind to"--so basically we were encouraged to try everything and if it worked great, if not, oh well! So fortunate that they loved each other and us and showed it. My DH and I 've tried to be the same way, although must say with my intellectually gifted, but VERY ADHD son (who did school work but lost it, etc) getting him though HS was a challenge and I wasn't always as encouraging as I could/should have been.
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