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Thread: Funny for Today

  1. #1
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    Funny for Today

    This is an old one, but always worth a chuckle:

    Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

    In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

    The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

    She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
    youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

    The defense attorney nearly died.

    The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,

    'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.

  2. #2
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    That's funny!

  3. #3
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    Good one!!!!

  4. #4
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    Oh Thats a good one. Had not heard that one before!!

  5. #5
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    What a great funnie for the day - loved it!

  6. #6
    Super Member Luv Quilts and Cats's Avatar
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    Very funny!
    Luv Quilts and Cats
    Never underestimate the healing effects of beauty. - Florence Nightingale

  7. #7
    Super Member Teacup's Avatar
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    Good one! Thanks for the laugh!

  8. #8
    Super Member katesnanna's Avatar
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    Good one!!

  9. #9
    Super Member mandyrose's Avatar
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    good one! I have a neighbor like that she such a sweet heart doing good for pushing 90

  10. #10
    Super Member JoanneS's Avatar
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    It may be an old one, but I hadn't heard it - and it's one of the best lawyer jokes I've ever heard!

  11. #11
    Power Poster Mariposa's Avatar
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    a good one!
    Be a blessing to others, as you may entertain angels unaware!

  12. #12
    Senior Member judee0624's Avatar
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    LOL!!! I am sending this one on.

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