You definately did the right thing. A life lesson learned early>

Amen to that Auntiehenno,My son and his wife keep a close eye and hand on their two girls. both spirited little 6 & 7yr.olds and They started their training early. They don't get away with much.They are taught to respect the teachers and grandparents the same as parents. When we went to Dinner at Red Lobster, and walking in My son started questioning them, (what type voice do we use?)the girls(inside voice) son (what type of activity?) girls(sitting at the table, no running around) so on.LOL had to laugh,they sounded like it was a regular drill each time they went out to eat. but it works and we all had a nice dinner,even the people at the next table.

You have a smart son and daughter-in-law. We have four kids and when we hired a babysitter to go out to dinner or a movie it always irritated me when other people's children disturbed our time. I don't know why parents think it's okay for their kids to run around the restaurant or movie.

Also, our youngest child is handicapped..even with his disabilities he is better behaved than most children.

I just got a text today from my 20 year old son saying he finally understood. He had a tough time in high school with bullying. He is now serving in the Air Force and planning out his future. His "friends" are still living at home, most with children of their own, no plans for education, etc. Makes you feel pretty good as a parent.

This is my second comment on this topic, but I think everyone agrees that discipline and values are important. Important enough to sometimes step on toes, even if those toes are related to you.

I agree whole heartedly with this response!! I was a school secretary for 30 years. Believe me.....kids NEED to know and be TAUGHT there ARE consequences for their actions (good and bad). Better for them to learn the concept while it is a toy and not someone's health or worse their life.

I think it sounds pretty good, actually. You, at least, gave him some options and kids should learn that they shouldn't just tear up something belonging to someone else because they want to be MEAN!

Was it his parents who said this? If it was anyone else, ignore it. If it was his parents, sadly it will undermine your commendable efforts.

I think your approach was great (as long as you are sure he did it deliberately)

I think you did the right thing. It's sad that his parents didn't do something right away when it happened. My mom would've done the same thing. She has always treated her grandchildren like she did us and that meant not only showing them she loves them but discipline as well.

I think you did great.

Thank you for teaching your grandchild how to behave and there are consequences for his actions. If you are getting flack from the family, then shame on them. The parents of this child new better. You raised one of them. Thanks again. I thought I was the only one who sees children now a days getting away with anything and are entitled to do what they want. Bless you.

Perfect solution (restitution). A life lesson that just might stick! :thumbup: If other people would only have the courage to discipline in love we'd have a more civil society. Point out to those who have critisized you, that you didn't beat him or even charge him what the toy actually cost, you also taught him a lesson in mercy. :thumbup:

Hear Hear!! Kids are so spoiled and coddled now, which is the fault of the parents AND the grandparents!! My kids were taught the value of money at a very young age...they were paid by the chores they did. If they worked hard, they earned a lot of money. If they didn't, they got none. There was a chart on the wall in the kitchen showing each chore and how much it was worth. They had free choice. All they had to do was put their name in the square for each day for each chore they selected. I verified each chore and checked it off. Friday evening was "Pay Day".

AND, if they purposely misused or in anger broke something, they had to pay for it. Accidental breakage was, of course, forgiven.

We also did NOT loan money against "future earnings".

Our kids almost all grew up to responsible, goals oriented adults.

[quote=feline fanatic]IMHO, parents who do not teach their children that there are consequences for their actions (bad and good) are doing their children a grave disservice and eventually releasing irresponsible adults into society who have a misguided sense of entitlement.
----------------------------
Yes....just sit back and listen to a bunch of cops and/or jail and prison guards talking about the strange ideas of their charges. Most of these cons seem to be honestly confused as to why they were arrested, they apologized to the victims, didn't they? And so why are they still in jail? They seem to have absolutely no idea of there being any consequences of their actions, Mommy and Daddy would bail them out if they got into trouble. And far too often the parents did so, until the crimes got serious enough to send them to jail.
Parents like raising kids like this are giving my oldest son and oldest daughter life time jobs in a prison and a jail!!!!

I love to watch Supernanny whip those parents into shape.

Agree with this....they have to learn especially when it was done out of anger. Besides it was at your house and you should be able to set your own rules.

And the flack that you gave him is what is sorely lacking today in parenting skills. There are consequences for one's actions, the sooner they learn this, the better.

I just hope the "flak" didn't happen in the child's presence. Perhaps you should ask the ones who are complaining just how they think the situation should have been handled, but you'll have to ask it in a way that expresses curiosity rather than an accusation, or they'll just light into you again. I think a lot of times issues between adults about how a child should be disciplined are just a power struggle between the adults. They resent that you exercised this authority, even if they didn't have the gumption to do anything about the behavior themselves. Kids will pick up on this and the bad behavior will escalate if it seems that in doing so he can manipulate adults into a blow-up.

You are a great grand parent. Children need to be taught the meaning of responsibility for the actions. They realize what they did was wrong. If you let him get away with it he may do something worse the next time. Plus he needs to learn how to control his anger even if he is eight. Your reaction was age approiate. I'm feel bad for you that you got flack for doing the responsible thing.