From cradle to grave in one institution after another vs cradle to grave at home
 

Some folks have babies at home some would never think of it and in fact would rather have a Caesarian birth or other institutional type birth. Some babies are laid on the floor on a home made quilt to explore and wiggle about some are in confined in a walker. I see people hauling babies in a seat rather than carry them or using a carrier. When they are big enough to walk they confine them to a stroller - some until ridiculous age, too... Do they get tired too easily because they don't get enough exercise? Or are they confined because they aren't disciplined enough not to run off. Some put a baby or small child in day care some keep them home. At home do they play with toys and computers or do they manipulate real things? Are kids taught how to work? How to sew? How to cook? How about food? Are they eating nuggets or real chicken? Do they eat fast food or convenience food? Do they dig in the dirt or keep the designer clothes clean all the time? Do they run barefoot through the grass? How about education? At home? Daycare? Hybrid like home and preschool? Computers? No computers? Do they read a book or watch it as a movie? Home education or institutional education? Is a first choice for a vacation an amusement park or a state park? Even then tent or RV? Making music or listening to canned music? Is religion confined to a building or a regular part of life? What about career? Institution or self employment? Job in huge corporation or job with smaller company? Heath care from institutional doctor or alternative medicine? Old age care at home or nursing home? Death with tubes and wires or not? Comfort care or life supports?

life is full of choices, isn't it? and very few of them are right or wrong [thinking of the illegal things in the wrong category :) ]

Like it or not we all fall into one institution or another...

As the grandmother of a child with autism I've learned not to judge the parenting of others. Decisions are made based on individual circumstances. This also applies to my two parents in assisted living. I know my limitations and could never give them the care they're getting.

and the point is......

sandy

If a child is loved and cared for it doesn't matter if he is in a walker, stroller, in day care or public school. Same with elderly in assisted living or hospital. Living changes decade to decade. What was norm for the 50's cannot be done today on a daily basis. I for one will not burden my kids with my care as I age. It puts a noose around their necks loaded with guilt. Thank goodness there are assisted living facilities.

Be the visitor...not the caregiver...referri g to nursing homes.NO ONE ever wants to have to make that decision but we had to. My mom would never had wanted to be a burden on her kids. Sadly she needed nursing home care. We visited often and for hours on end. So glad she is at Peace though we miss her terribly. Watching her decline was heartbreaking. Mom fully understood life cycles and the cold hard truth. Just knowing her wishes carried us through.

sandy

I think each person who reads Miriam's thought provoking posts from the wee hours of the morning will come up with "the point" that applies to him or her. I see it as something akin to the prose of CD in Oklahoma.

I believe most people do the best they can do at the time and under the circumstances.
There is never a perfect solution to any of the things you talk about.