I have a little corner set up for sewing at my In-laws. My MIL has no patience to sit two seconds to look at anything unless is a soap opera. Last night I was swing and she started looking at the quilt I am working on. Is a carpenter's wheel, dark maroon, bright yellow, white, with black borders. I am putting a lot of effort into the quilting. My backing is green. I used beige thread on the back for the quilting, and changed the color of the top thread everytime I had a color change on the top. My black borders get black on the top and bottom so the beige doesn't show on the top. She is moving the quilt, touching and pulling while I quilt, but I said nothing. all of a sudden she said she doesn't like the top. She prefers the back. She said: I can use it to cover the back of the chair, but I will use it with the green up.

First, the quilt is not for her, is just for my pile of quilts I am planning to sell, second, I put so much effort into matching corners and great quilting, and she prefers the back. Is a good thing she left before I had a chance to react. I guess it was better not to answer.

Better to be quiet. Hopefully you will find an apartment and be able to move out soon.

I think those who don't quilt, don't have a clue how hurtful a comment like that could be. Sorry your MIL was so insensitive.

Maybe you can cut her two pieces of green fabric, sew them together, and give it to her. :lol: :lol:

She was just looking for a way to get a dig in. Ignoring it or a calm response was best...she was after your reaction and you would have given her what she wanted. If she tries criticism again, maybe just calmly saying, "Well, it's a good thing it's not for you then, isn't it?" might work. Just don't feed into it.

Boy, she has the NERVE. But, you were probably right to just bite your tongue and keep it to yourself, since you're in her house. Hopefully, you'll find somewhere to live quickly and you can get on with your life and sewing.

Well, we know how MILs can be. And whether it's on purpose or not, that doesn't change the behavior. It's not right of her.
So, even though I'm a MIL myself, I say just go on and do what you want to do anyway, and keep peace in your heart and head.
It's the best revenge!!

Ummm, you are in her home, and sewing is not a silent thing to be doing when you are on a machine. Maybe it was her passive aggressive way of asking you to be quiet while she watches a soap opera?

I have had the reaction from older women who don't quilt.
I think they see quilting as an admission that you are poor!
a depression thing!
My mother and grandmother are the same way!
just to bad they can't see the beauty in what we do!
I have given my mother a quilt that was one of my best, in colors and theme that she likes it is still in her closet. Where it has been since I gave it to her years ago.
last year when I was busy making sale quilts for a festival she asked if I wanted it back to sell!
It means nothing to her!
I have to accept that and move on!

Believe me I know how you feel.
We had "Christmas in August" at our house this weekend and my daughter's bf wanted to see some of my quilts, so I hauled out some tops and some quilts to show him. My S-I-L whose only hobby is chain-smoking watched for awhile and announce quite pompously, "Well isn't that just a waste of time and money!"
DH bless him, said quite sweetly, "Dear, why don't you and your attitude take your cigarettes outside for a puff." GAWD I love that man!

Honestly, though... if that was her way of getting her DIL to stop sewing, that was not a nice way to do it. Had she just said, "The sewing machine noise is a bit too much, could you wait to sew until I am not watching TV?" she would not have been offending. The way she went about it, it definately seems that she was deliberately trying to get a rise out of her DIL.

That is what passive aggressive people do, they try to make you look like the bad guy.

I'm a MIL and my DIL is my best friend. We made a promise to each other way before the marriage that we would be honest with each other and try not to hurt each other's feelings. Sad when MIL's can't see things that way. Your MIL probably couldn't find it in her heart to compliment you on your fine work, so a pseudo-insult was the best she could find. Don't lower yourself to her level, keep mum and pray that your situation is only temporary. The day will come when she will see what a wonderful person you really are.

Is your MIL's name...Just kidding. My MIL never said a kind word to me for years, then she finally realized who takes care of her and isthere for her. She is 85 now. She is so sweet nad rather than complain about me all the time to family, now all she does is brags on me. But I agree with others, those who don't quilt, pout. LOL.

I would not interfere with her TV watching a bit. They have their own apartment separate from the area where we are. They have a huge basement and they don't have to see us if they don't want. I know is not the noise that bothers her, is the fact that I am busy with my own little thing and not listening to her gossiping about the neighbors, the soap opera or God knows what else. She lives everybody else's life but hers, and as long as she stays away from mine I don't say a thing. Is amazing to even see my kids not paying attention to her.

Hugs! Hopefully you can find your own place soon!

It's a real shame when lonely people lash out rather than reach out. Of course that's the real reason they're so lonely...they've pushed everyone away, maybe not even realizing they're doing so by insisting everything be on their terms and trying to run everyone else's lives for them.

OK, sorry, I have a small home, and if I am sewing everyone can hear it.
I misunderstood what you were saying, when you said a corner, I pictured my set up on the dining table, which is in the lounge/TV area.
I can see the TV from the table, and if you are watching TV, you cannot hear it if I am sewing.

She sounds hard to live with.

boy is he a quick thinker....love it

Us MILs tend to put our foot in our mouth a lot. Here's a thought. You're living with them.....maybe she thinks the least you can do is make HER a quilt!!??????

I was going to suggest the same thing! Tell her here is her chair cover...

;-)

Hugs Hugs, you do beautful work on your quilting and don't let her get you upset, she is jealous that you make beautiful quilts

Sorry to hear this :cry: "It is what it is"
It sounds like she DOESN"T have a life and lives vicariously through gossip and neighbors. Coming into you, well jealously come to mind. You have something going on and she doesn't.
Is there a SSCenter you could take her too?? Or lunch with her friends?? I'm not taking her side,just to get her off of yours so you can sew. It might make her a happier person.
How is the job hunting going??? It was TERRIBLE what your friend did to you on your last interview.
Buy the way, the quilt sounds beautiful you are making............

Gee, you'd rather quilt than listen to gossip about the neighbors??? hee hee
I know this thread wasn't meant to be funny but people like that make me laugh. Whenever someone says something nasty I just think to myself "Consider the source".
Maride you deserve a medal for keeping quiet but that's the best thing you could have done. We all love your work and I hope you find your own place soon.
HUGS

Hope you are still putting ice on your swollen tongue :wink: Because I bet it is really swollen from where you had to keep biting it :shock:

Good for you for being the better person :thumbup:

I guess that is what the old saying "grin and bear it" was meant for! She sounds like a miserable person....enough said! ;-)

The world is made up of some interesting people. We can't all have the same passion (or there just wouldn't be enough fabric to go around)!

At least she liked the back.

I had a MIL like this for years, and I hate to say it, but now that she is gone I don't miss her one bit. I think about all of the heartache she caused and how it is a relief not to have her around anymore, and it makes me more conscious of how I treat other family members. I don't ever want anyone to be relieved when I am no longer around. I want to be missed in a good way.

It is sad that she is so lonely it may have been her way to try to start a conversation with you. Sometimes when people live in their own worlds it is hard for them to live in the real life. My grandmother only has her TV friends. She may have seen that it matches her decor or something like that. My experience with MIL's is non exsistant she hated me from the begining and we have not seen her in 9 years. I know it is hard to hear but maybe it was her way of getting to know you. Yes her way is rude but if all she nows is her TV friends this is all she has. Take care and know that this online family loves your work and it is incredible that you can share this with us! and Please post a picture of your quilt I would love to see is since I have yet to try hand quilting!

I've never had in law problems and I'm so thankful! I would have ignored her too!

I had to have had the best MIL you could wish for. She was also into crafts, would try anything once, and would have been quilting along with me. She was like my own mum to me.

This has nothing to do with quilting but it's about MIL's. Our daughter got married in May at a location 2 hours from our home town. A relative was nice enough to drive my MIL and her 96 year old mother to the wedding. They all left right after dinner ,before the slideshow or first dance etc. I'm thinking it's a long day for them both and they must be tired. They didn't get home until after 1:00 in the morning because they went to the casino!!! They missed the slide show that had been in memory of those that have passed away including my FIL.
If I had to live with her I would her I would wrap my sewing machine cord around her neck and just pull.
Maride you are a SAINT!!!

Just say she likes my quilting better than piecing, so she wants to show off the back!

I found out the hard way that my mil was quite jealous of me. She was "sick" and had her minister out one time and he met me outside and said that she feels I took her only child away from her. When my husband was a child, she never wanted him. Oh, well. Told me to hang in there.

I made a queen size quilt for her in February and she still has it in the box, only opened when she looked at it the first time. No way I will make her another one. I may go insane this week. She is always dying of some weird disease that doesn't exist, and on Monday she went to the dr and pretended to pass out from an asthma attack. I know it was pretend because an hour later she was on the way to the casino. The Dr gave her prednisone, 40 mg. Way too much! She is now so hyper, I could scream. Can't stop talking, complaining, and just yap yap yap! I think I will bring Emi to the park!

Sometime we have people in our lives that rubs us the wrong way. They are like sandpaper, and you are a diamond in the ruff the more she rubs the more you shine.
My mil never said anything nice about me. I have been in the family 40 years. When she was told that I had cancer she cried.
I am sure she has a loving heart deep down it may take a while for it to surface. You did the right thing, keeping you tongue still is almost impossible or at lease it is for me.

I hope she doesn't live with you! Best to ignore it I guess. Hard as it would be. Probably has other comments on everything you do right? :(

ROFLMAO!! make it cheap fleece at that! sorry i am feeling a little hateful today.

Maybe if you asked her what colors she would have liked instead, she would not be so critical knowing that you show interest in what she likes. Even if you don't really. Ha ha ha! Just wonder what the reaction would have been.