I loved that one!!

My grand daughter would call deviled eggs... Doubled eggs

A few weeks ago we went to dinner with the kids and grands. Our eldest gs is 8. We were talking about the tour de France and how Poppy use to bike. Our daughter suggested Pops should get back into biking. My husband said, " I gave up exercise at 50!" Our 5 year old gs said "Why Poppy" and Patting his Poppy's shoulder, our 8 year old gs said " Oh, I undersand Poppy, you no longer feel like the man you once were." WHAT!? Out of the mouths of babes! We're still laughing about that one.

When my DS was small he was caught with the tubes that tampons come in. They were in his pocket, he was taking them to school for show and tell.

Olivia did that recently all the way from the bathroom to our table. Weren't many people there at the time. She used to say after she pooped that Mommy and Daddy would be so proud of her.

lol! I wonder what he was planning for the "tell" part! I'd love to hear stories from teachers about some of the things kids bring in for show-n-tell. I can remember bringing in a handful of porcupine needles when it was my turn.... I wonder what the teacher thought.

I'm a nurse. One day I went into my patient's room and she started gushing about my haircut. " I just love your haircut..it's tapered beautifully and trimmed so nice over the ears! I aught to know." By this time I had a smile ear to ear and was getting a big head. "Thank-you" I replied, "Are you a beautician?" "No" she replied, "I'm a dog groomer!" I went out of the room wanting to go "woof-woof."

I went into an elderly patient's room and he was coughing alot. I commented about all his coughing and he replied " I just thought it was an old fashioned cold but the doctor told me it was prostate problems!"

Very briefly and long ago, I taught kindergarten in a church school. One morning one little guy brought an extra pencil box, apparently full of treasures to be shared throughout the day. During his reading group, he passed around peanuts in shells. He gave me a key chain from a car dealership, "for your dad." He brought a butter knife in case other kids at lunch needed help cutting their food. Then he pulled out a feminine pad and rubbed it against his face because it was so soft. Whew! This was all before lunch! Just as I was asking myself, "What's next?" the afternoon quieted down, until he put his coat on at the end of the day. He pulled SOMETHING out of his jacket pocket, about the size of a handiwipe and asked, "What's this?" Yes, folks, it was a condom!

More recently, I told a group of high school students to cross something out. One student asked, "So we should just excrement that out?" We had a funny vocabulary lesson that day!

I have to tell one about a dear friends teenage son. He had gone in to take a shower and had UNFORTUNATELY taken his contacts out. Later in the afternoon he complained his face was burning and was bright red. My friend asked asked him what he had washed his face with and he replied the usual soap in the shower, but he had used the tube of lotion on his face that he had found under the sink. She burst into a fit of laughter and went into the bathroom and brought him the tube of cream he had put on his face. He now had his contacts in and could see the writing on the tube. . . . . . VAGINAL HORMONE CREAM!!!