Murder at costco
 

MURDER AT COSTCO




Tired of constantly
Being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary and then arranging to have her killed.




A 'friend of a friend'


Put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $10,000.





The Husband said he was willing to pay that amount but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar coin that rested inside.


Artie sighed, rolled his eyes and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.





A few Days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Costco Supermarket. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.





However, Unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the shop's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave The premises.



Under intense Questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was a lso quickly arrested.


The next day in the Newspaper, the headline declared...









(You're going to hate me for this...)




'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ Costco

Hahahaha! Ditter, you never fail to crack me up :) Thanks for the laugh it was well needed today.

Laughing to myself

I was waiting for that one! great punch line!!!

LOL. I will have to share with my DS when he gets home from work. He works at COSTCO:)

Good one! I needed a good joke today..thanks..

Oh Good One! I didnt see that coming!

Yes, Ditter, I am going to hate you ... but gotta' finish laughing first .... and that may take awhile!

No, actually I love you! and your jokes!!!

Oh, Ditter! Again I'm out-right laughing. Where do you come up with all your "stories?"

Too funny! Thank you again. You are the best! You never fail to brighten my day!

Gee Whiz, Ditter, I think that you got me out of my blue fog this morning, with this one. I actually laughed out loud...it is soooo stupid. I am still chuckling.

That's a great way to start your day! Laughing!

:D ​Very funny!

That is a good one! I can't wait to pass it along to my DH & daughters.

Another good one from Ditter; just love you !

laughing,laughing,laughing

Fabulous! Great laugh for my morning coffee, which is now all over my pj's!

Just recited this to my DH. he looked at me like I was crazy when I started, but got a good chuckle out of it when I got to the punchline. Thanks for the funny!

Funny story!

Ditter, you are great,thank you for sharing .....

Now that's funny! lol

this was GREAT! thanks for the early morning humor!

ah, my {giggle} for the day - thank you {snort}

Too funny
Thanks for the chuckle

Ditter, I love your jokes!!!!!

you are funny.

Thank you Ditter! you have brightened my day.

lol. Funnnnnnnnnnny

Ditter you are truely a blessing to us all. you make us laugh and we know that is soooo good for the soul!

I did not see that one coming! Great joke!

Very funny, thank you for the laugh

Your funnies are the highlight of my day. Get me off to a great start. Thanks so much Ditter.

Funny out loud chuckle!

I really needed that this morning. Thanks......

Thank you Ditter!!:thumbup:

I just scared my dogs by laughing so hard!

all I have to say is LOL

Very funny!! LOL!

Oh that was so funny. Love it.