I would think of the child not the thoughtless mother. Make sure the quilts are personalized for each child so they have a memory that someone loved them... If this helps.

i understand your feelings honestly my sister is the same way but i do feel for the third child how will they feel when the others have a quilt but they never got one......i would have to say bite the bullet and do it anyway.....

I come from a large family. YOU have to decide what your gifting rules are. I give a new baby gift for every new niece/ nephew, into GREATS, however, I only do showers for 1st born(its their job to hang on to their baby stuff). I don't always make something( although burp cloths are fast & usually appreciated)-maybe just a pkg of diapers & wipes. Some of my siblings have never bought a gift for my children., which is OK. MY NEICE thanked me PROFUSELY for buying her DOLLAR GENERAL diapers, which were strong & less expensive & saved her $$$ end line DO WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU!

I would go ahead and make the baby a quilt. The baby can't help being born and is just an innocent little life.