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Speaking of Christmas
I hear a lot of people getting depressed at Christmas,,,its hard to afford gifts in this economy. My family has not done gift giving for years as far as "spending" money.
Aside from the real reason for Christmas ,,its way overated,stresses people out and is a financial burden.. At our house we have a meal,sing together( I play the piano,,,my son and grandsons play the guitar),we trade home made goodies and just hang out. One thing my sister and I always did(she is deceased now) is through out the year we would see something at one anothers house that we liked and comment on it and at Christmas we would surprise each other with one of the items.That was our personal little tradition,and I miss it now that she is gone,but my daughter and I sometimes do that. Another thing my kids did(years ago when they were small) was on Christmas eve they would snuggle up beside the Christmas tree,and sleep there.That started out of our house being cold and them sleeping near the woodstove,but it turned into a tradition,and I slept there too(I was a single mom,so we did things differently than most anyway).My kids still talk about "tree night" and tell their kids about it. When people ask me if I have my shopping done yet,I just smile. For those who can afford it,God bless them,but for those of us who cant,,,make your own traditions and just be thankful .No fighting crowds,no standing in return lines,no stressing over what to get for who,,,so on and so on!!! Wheee!!!! |
You have some precious memories there! We have scaled back our Christmas too, with a few gifts going to the grandbabies and underware and socks to the parents! I like to make as many gifts as possiable, this year is a no make year :( due to health issues on my part. Remember the real reason for Christmas and save yourself a lot of stress.
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We should all remember the real reason for Christmas. I am shocked and saddened at the number of people who say that Christmas is not a religious holiday; that it is not a Christian holiday, just a nice holiday for anyone. To me that is like saying we should all observe Ramadan or Passover.
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For untold reasons this is also a problem at my house. We will have a nice family dinner, buy what we can afford, and have a great day. As far as I am concerned it is a day for the children. Remember those who can will do and those who can't will still have a good time.
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We scaled back last year. Not only bc of money, but my children are adults and buy what they want. I was always stressing over the perfect gift. Does it exist? Now I do stockings for all. Olivia, the only little grandchild, gets gifts too.
Due to health issues with DH, I'm slow to start decorating this year, much less worry about gifts. Glad we chose to scaled back last year. |
Bless you!
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What if you don't have family nearby? All my family live very far away. So I can understand when people say it's a sad time for them.
I feel the same way. I don't even want to decorate for Xmas. I just think of all the stuff I would have to take down. LOL We are going to have a very very small tree this year. Nothing special. Bah Humbug! |
Thank-you for that post! As a single Mom and trying to make ends meet from check to check there just isn't any real surpluss for all the crazy Christmas shopping blitzes that I refuse to participate in anyway...Christmas is about God's gift to the world and I stress that we are so blessed all year through that we need to compare down to those who are not just in need of a gift, but time and love and encouragement this Christmas season. When all the wrapping is thrown away I remind the girls that every year 6 mo. after Christmas there is really only the one gift they ask for that they remember getting. We too have had a tree night by our fireplace and roast marshmallows and watch a Christmas movie and every Christmas morning before opening gifts we read the Christmas story from the Bible. Thank-you again, and God BLess you all:)
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Christmas celebrations can be whatever you want them to be. We have scaled down over the years as the kids and grandkids have gotten older. Gift cards work best noe. Two little Great Granddaughters are easy to buy for. I pretty much spend what I can afford and that works well.
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You warmed my heart today...thank you.
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Words of wisdom we might all abide by. My immediate family is three and my extended family is my one and only sister her husband, children and grands. We give gifts to each other through church related ministry. Last year I gave my son Soccer Balls that went to a boys mission school. My sister and brother-in-law received a goats that went to support as family in Africa and we helped build a well at Christmas also. This was done with the help of my sister and husband. My other children come off of the Salvation Army Christmas Tree and. We hav been so blessed in our lives that this seemed the best way for us to celebrate Christmas.
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That is really awesome! I am glad you have such nice christmas traditions... your christmas sounds a lot like our thanksgiving tradition, but I kinda like the idea of just 'hanging out' with the family. this year our oldest child is making gifts to give away, so she is learning the gift of giving and at the same time having fun of being creative. I am hoping to develop some more nice christmas traditions as our kids get older.
Thanks for sharing your traditions with us! |
We do not celebrate Christmas with presents. We have what we call a "First Fire." This is the first fire we put in our fireplace on the first really cold night of the year, we usually plan it on a weekend. The date varies, but we know it will be in either November or December. On this night, we bring something to share foodwise, a little wine and basically sit around the fireplace, no TV or radio or stereo. We talk about our year, how it went, our joys, concerns, eat popcorn, listen to the fire and just "chill" as my youngest daughter likes to say. It is soothing, it does not entail presents, everyone can either participate or just snooze in front of the fire. The kids play in the room around us as we sit in front of the fire or sleep on someones lap. We make plans to keep everyone over night because we usually talk until the wee hours and in the morning have a BIG breakfast. Everyone goes home. Over the years I have asked the girls if they want to continue to do this and the answer is a resounding Yes.
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Thank you. You made me stop and remember the true meaning of Christmas. I am so thankful just to have my family around me on this beautiful day.
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Our family quit giving gifts about 4 years ago and just have a nice dinner, It's so much more relaxing and
A lot less stress. We don't miss it at all. |
We've cut way back on gifts too as we just don't need them to have a wonderful meal together and a family day. My kids are all young adults and I buy a few simple things (socks, mitts,
chocolate) and give them $ to spend at the Boxing Day sales right after Christmas. That way they can buy the clothes or electronics they want and I don't have to worry about sizes and colours and exchanges when items don't fit. It works well for us. |
Having a 12 yr old daughter, we still do the gift thing because she enjoys it, but we always pick an older person that we know lives on a very limited budget and take in grocery staple items for them plus things like toilet paper, dish and laundry detergent, canned goods, sugar, flour, etc.
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Since my sons and their families live too far away to visit and sending gifts in the mail has gotten so expensive our Christmas gift from them are a phone call from each. Living on SSA is hard enough and our check comes in on the 4th Weds of the month. This month it will be in on the 28th. Three days after Christmas. I do like to send cookies, that if my two sons do not get they would be dissapointed, and a few small things for each of the members of the families but we usually buy after Christmas (50% off) and they have something to look forward to after the New Year. Other then that I miss the traditions that we had before they moved away and have my own little pity party and then pull up my Big Girl Pants and go on with the New Year. Wishing everyone a Very Merry Christmas (how ever you spent it) and a Very Happy New Year!!!
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I try really hard not to get depressed and sad at Christmas, but it doesn't work. I am very thankful for what I have and very thankful for my furbabies, but it is still really hard to be alone on holidays.
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We've scaled back because of retirement funds being so little and the kids are grown and have their own houses and lives. One son and DIL always give us an updated family pic already framed and that is special to me. The older kids like money so that's easy and the little ones are easy to buy a gift or two for. We don't spend lots of money but I'm making things this year. I've always done large cookie and candy boxes for each family and I do that for my neighbors also. It's the little things that make the holidays for me.
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Sadiemae, I can almost identify with you. I started crying this week thinking about when I would be a widow. I know I shouldn't anticipate sorrow and should just be so happy I still have my husband alive, but sometimes the knowledge that I won't have him always comes and it makes me so sad. I hope you can cope in whatever way works for you, and that memories can comfort you. And that you can feel God's love close to you when we celebrate this time of remembering the birth of Christ.
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Sadimae,,,please feel free to Pm me and visit online at Christmas!!! Not the same as being there,but maybe it will help you not feel so alone...I know that would be very difficult.Y0u are loved!! Hugs!!!!
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Sad at Christmas
Originally Posted by Sadiemae
(Post 4745077)
I try really hard not to get depressed and sad at Christmas, but it doesn't work. I am very thankful for what I have and very thankful for my furbabies, but it is still really hard to be alone on holidays.
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Thanks so much for thinking of me, I appreciate it so much. It was a long night. I didn't know they were shooting off fireworks in my little town, and my little poodle was a basketcase all night. I am glad it is time for bed.
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SadieMae, I am exactly where you are. I have wonderful children, but several live away and the others are busy with their own lives. I cried last night, but today is new day. I finally realized I am no one's primary giftgiver - except the dogs and they don't need anything except love, walks and food. I am getting a small gift for each family member - and that's a large number - 5 children, 4 in law children, 12 grandchildren, 4 in law GC, 7 great GC and seven others. I had to give away my big tree because I couldn't deal with it alone due to health restraints. I will have a small prelit one.
I still manage to enjoy the season and the love of family of friends, but there are still many alone times. You are wise, RIversong, to make memories while you can. |
so sweet. Enjoy life!
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Riversong, you can adopt me anytime!! We are not big on gifts. When DH and I got married we decided not to give gifts to each other but to donate to a charity instead.
DH's family was BIG on presents. His brother & SIL would give his parents a TV, parents would give them a TV. We would give gifts of homemade jam, in return we got the $9.99 gift box from Wisconsin Cheeseman. It was very much a case of "tit for tat". I don't have kids but if I did I can't imagine giving them gifts depending on what they gave me. After a few years we quit and all the adults get tribute cards saying a charity gift has been made in their name DH's ex also was a BIG gift giver, so his kids grew up with that. We gave them gifts while they were small, once they became adults they get a charity donation. Now there are GK's, we bring a small gift when we go to visit. We are away on Christmas and their birthdays and do not send anything. DH says he would rather see them open the gift. Plus it would get very expensive to mail them all, as some are overseas. But I am sure they all think we are terrible grandparents. Also, we have told the whole family we do not want gifts for ourselves. We have everything we need. One of DH's sons sends homemade treats. His daughter sometimes sends photos of the GK's. In the words of Peace Pilgrim, "I felt that I could no longer accept more than I need while others in the world have less than they need." The older I get, the more I am bewildered by the constant striving for money and THINGS. |
I love Christmas because I love the decorations and our tree. We enjoy it for at least a month. I could care less about gifts, it is the spirit of the season. In our small community almost everyone decorates their lamp post so to walk around at night it feels like a wonderland. People are outside greeting each other, while most of the rest of the year many never come out. So to me it is a gift of community. On Christmas eve almost everyone sets out and lights luminaries in front of their houses. Of course, there are some people who have these great big blow up things they think are in good taste???
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Originally Posted by ptquilts
(Post 4746128)
Riversong, you can adopt me anytime!! We are not big on gifts. When DH and I got married we decided not to give gifts to each other but to donate to a charity instead.
DH's family was BIG on presents. His brother & SIL would give his parents a TV, parents would give them a TV. We would give gifts of homemade jam, in return we got the $9.99 gift box from Wisconsin Cheeseman. It was very much a case of "tit for tat". I don't have kids but if I did I can't imagine giving them gifts depending on what they gave me. After a few years we quit and all the adults get tribute cards saying a charity gift has been made in their name DH's ex also was a BIG gift giver, so his kids grew up with that. We gave them gifts while they were small, once they became adults they get a charity donation. Now there are GK's, we bring a small gift when we go to visit. We are away on Christmas and their birthdays and do not send anything. DH says he would rather see them open the gift. Plus it would get very expensive to mail them all, as some are overseas. But I am sure they all think we are terrible grandparents. Also, we have told the whole family we do not want gifts for ourselves. We have everything we need. One of DH's sons sends homemade treats. His daughter sometimes sends photos of the GK's. In the words of Peace Pilgrim, "I felt that I could no longer accept more than I need while others in the world have less than they need." The older I get, the more I am bewildered by the constant striving for money and THINGS. |
scaled back here too. the pension doesn't go very far. I made fruits, veggies, cakes, pizzas, pastries etc for the 2 lil grands. their mum is getting them a store" so grandma made the wares. It was so much fun. made sets of fabric bowls, a few quilts etc for the older kids. made em a few ornaments and I have been getting nagged about the tree not being up yet. We used to put it up at Thanksgiving. Just seems silly to do it that early now with only 1 daughter at home. But by George we are putting it up today!
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It's not a problem for me & mine. We make wish lists with stuff that's not expensive & we want. I tend to make gifts, mostly for people who appreciate it. It's all good.
I just don't stress out about it. |
Speaking of Christmas
I have lived in the Middle East for the past 18 years, and the first few years were so very sad for me... no Christmas eve church service, no visits with my parents, no turkey on the dining table. But when my children came along, I felt the need to create some little traditions, and that is really the only important thing to us. WE make the decisions about how much or how little celebrating we do. It makes it very special. AND we aren't bombarded by Christmas music everywhere we turn! Woohoo!
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No matter what your personal reason for the season is I just love the holidays because it is the spirit of the holidays that is fun. The decorations are festive and people forget their everyday issues and focus on giving and doing for others. That isn't about gifts, it is a reminder that there are other things outside of ourselves that are important. It is a time for awareness. Each year we look at what extra we might have and then divide it 4 ways so that each of us has a giving opportunity. Some years it is only 10.00 each and then there was the 100.00 year. We went to Toys R Us and each of us had 100.00 that we spent on toys and then donated to Toys for Tots. I think DH was a bigger kid than any of us. He really took sales to heart and made his money go far including two bikes. I was really proud of the kids. They looked for gifts for all ages and made their money go far. The manager of the store was so impressed with them that he gave them each 10% off and that made their money go even farther. Sometimes we have not had any extra but we always figure that each of us can eat a little less and share a little more and make sure that friends or neighbors that are alone have a dinner invitation.
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Originally Posted by babindg12200
(Post 4743301)
What if you don't have family nearby? All my family live very far away. So I can understand when people say it's a sad time for them.
I feel the same way. I don't even want to decorate for Xmas. I just think of all the stuff I would have to take down. LOL We are going to have a very very small tree this year. Nothing special. Bah Humbug! |
Originally Posted by Jingle
(Post 4743339)
Christmas celebrations can be whatever you want them to be. We have scaled down over the years as the kids and grandkids have gotten older. Gift cards work best noe. Two little Great Granddaughters are easy to buy for. I pretty much spend what I can afford and that works well.
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Of all the things I enjoy about Christmas, singing the Christmas hymns in church each Sunday in December is one of my favorites. Christmas Eve candlelight service is another. When I'm driving in the car I hunt for radio stations that are playing old favorite Christmas songs. They bring back such very happy memories and good emotions. I wish all of you God's blessings and Merry Christmas.
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I will sign up tomorrow to be a greeter at the later Christmas Eve service. The joy of the participants is infectious and I come home truly appreciating Christmas. I enjoy the lighting of the Advent candles each week - who doesn't appreciate Hope, Joy, Peace......
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Thank you for sharing these words of wisdom. How very true! In all the hustle and bustle and trumped-up jollity, we tend sometimes to forget what Christmas is really all about. For that reason, I do my shopping throughout the year and try to avoid doing any but routine (groceries, etc) shopping during this overcommercialized season. God bless everyone, and have a blessed and peaceful Christmas!
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I hope that those of you who are alone, can find a neighbor, a friend or even go to church or a soup kitchen, so that you are not alone. I have a neighbor that we take with us for Christmas, she is the same age as my MIL, and they get along great and she is not alone. We take her shopping and help her run her errands.
Christmas time is suppose to be happy, but I know that is not the case for everyone. Now that I have grandkids, i do a lot better, but there was I time i didn't want to crawl out of bed. You will be in my prayers and thoughts God Bless |
May the peace of god be with you today and forever more.....god bless and thank you for a story of love.......
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