Why I'm divorced . . .

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning..

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
'Happy Birthday!' and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out, she barely said good morning,
let alone' Happy Birthday.'

I thought....

Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids.... They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast
and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said,
'Good Morning Boss, and by the way 'Happy Birthday ! '
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door
and said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me..' I said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day. Let's go !'

We went to lunch.
But we didn't go where we normally would go.
She chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table.
We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office,
Jane said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office,
Do We ?'

I responded, 'I guess not.
What do you have in mind ?'
She said, 'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner..'

After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,
' Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment. I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes,
she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed
by my wife,
my kids,
and dozens of my friends
and co-workers,
all singing 'Happy Birthday'.


And I just sat there....

On the couch.....

Naked.

LOL!!!!!!!!

hysterical! thankyou for sharing :)

LOL, LOL LOl!!!!!!!!! TOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!

I love it! Thank you

I'm curious, why do men think that a woman is turned on by seeing a man naked on her couch? I would turn the other direction and run, unless I was married to him!!!!

I guess you were really surprised ---- along with everyone else.

that would do it!


thanks

Oh my........so funny. Thanks for the giggle.

Heard that one many times, BUT always as funny as the first time LOL

Oops!

That's a good one!

:oops: :-o

Now THAT is funny!

OMG I'm going to PMP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahahahahaha

And here I was starting to feel really sorry for you! LOL

That is funny!!

Funny!!!!!!

Too funny!!!

ROFL. I think I may pee my pants. Lol. Needed that! Thanks!!

I LOVE IT!!!!!!!

That gives new meaning to SUPRISE

OH NO!!!!!!! way to funny...thanks for the early morning chuckle.
LMAO

Good one! I'll have to tell my husband this one! :-)

Heard it before but it still made me laugh! :lol: :lol:

Cute.

THAT WAS SSSOOOOOO FUNNY!!

CUTE!!!!!!!!! Still laughing

You made my day!!



Maiziedo

OUCH!!!

That was funny! Although, generally, divorce isn't funny.

Luv it.

Ok, I feel stupid, :oops: :oops: :oops: I thought you were being serious, and my heart was breaking for you. Happy to hear it wasn't true!

Roflmao! I didn't see that one coming!

Toooooooooo cute

Loved it tnx

RIFLMAO

An unforgettable birthday ! - Cynthia

Laughing! and here I was feeling sorry for the guy!!! too funny :)

MEn!!! :)